Cringeworthy things
Discussion
What has recently made you cringe? Here are a few of my examples:
1. Friend was showing me some holiday pictures on his phone. For some reason, he flicked onto one that was his own dick.
2. Friend got married recently. He wore his favourite Apple cufflinks (because he cannot get enough Apple products). When he distributed photos of the wedding, one of them was simply his Apple cufflinks. Eh?
3. My brother met another man on holiday, they both got drunk and ended up having a game of hide the sausage behind a bush. Nothing wrong with that. However, the other chap was married and his wife was back at the room wondering where he had gone.
Anyone else go any good ones?
1. Friend was showing me some holiday pictures on his phone. For some reason, he flicked onto one that was his own dick.
2. Friend got married recently. He wore his favourite Apple cufflinks (because he cannot get enough Apple products). When he distributed photos of the wedding, one of them was simply his Apple cufflinks. Eh?
3. My brother met another man on holiday, they both got drunk and ended up having a game of hide the sausage behind a bush. Nothing wrong with that. However, the other chap was married and his wife was back at the room wondering where he had gone.
Anyone else go any good ones?
Edited by funkyrobot on Tuesday 16th May 12:53
Europa1 said:
Funkycoldribena said:
Went round a mates,wasnt sure if anyone was home so for some reason looked through the cat flap.
The image has haunted me for life.
Quietly slipped away and rang him from around the corner and asked him what he was up to...
You can't just leave it at that - details! The image has haunted me for life.
Quietly slipped away and rang him from around the corner and asked him what he was up to...
Do go on.
Funkycoldribena said:
funkyrobot said:
Europa1 said:
Funkycoldribena said:
Went round a mates,wasnt sure if anyone was home so for some reason looked through the cat flap.
The image has haunted me for life.
Quietly slipped away and rang him from around the corner and asked him what he was up to...
You can't just leave it at that - details! The image has haunted me for life.
Quietly slipped away and rang him from around the corner and asked him what he was up to...
Do go on.
mmm-five said:
During a lad's weekend at the Ring a few years ago, we decided to try to make it cheaper by sharing a room.
We don't do it anymore because of a couple of things:
My brother, on the other hand, would love that.We don't do it anymore because of a couple of things:
- A room with 8 single beds 12 inches from the next - you really don't want to wake up to see your mate's greying ginger pubes surrounding his meat & 2 veg just 3 inches from your face
- 8 large, middle-aged guys into 1 tiny bathroom does not go - there's never enough air freshener or toilet roll, nor a big-enough toilet brush
bunglesprout said:
A few years ago, my wife called me to ask to meet her at her mother's house after work to help move a mattress. I dutifully call round, go through the back door as usual (no pun intended). House all quiet. I shout a hello, and hear talking from upstairs. I go up and follow the voice into one of the bedrooms.............i walk in............the door to the ensuite is open............i cannot avoid looking in as i walk into bedroom, it is in my line of sight........ i am greeted with the sight of my 75 year old mother in law half standing position, getting off the toliet, underwear around her ankles, bent at the knees, legs akimbo, giving her moip a full on wipe with a wad of tissue.
And yes, we made eye contact.
What happened next? And yes, we made eye contact.
Rawwr said:
funkyrobot said:
Who has a hedge in a bathroom?
I know bushes sometimes get trimmed in bathrooms. But hedges?
He brought it along with him. OBVIOUSLY.I know bushes sometimes get trimmed in bathrooms. But hedges?
Quite good though, carrying a hedge around so you can always sneak behind it for a dip.
J4CKO said:
Neighbour has private plates with his initials on all his cars, when he gets a new one, he runs round with the latest plate on until it is about to become outdated and the private plates get put back on.
Very good.
What does he do if the model gets a facelift or is superseded?
J4CKO said:
funkyrobot said:
J4CKO said:
Neighbour has private plates with his initials on all his cars, when he gets a new one, he runs round with the latest plate on until it is about to become outdated and the private plates get put back on.
Very good.
What does he do if the model gets a facelift or is superseded?
https://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/profile.asp?me...
Ari said:
J4CKO said:
Neighbour has private plates with his initials on all his cars, when he gets a new one, he runs round with the latest plate on until it is about to become outdated and the private plates get put back on.
That's good, but I think I can out numberplate cringe that.I once knew a guy who's initials were SK.
His numberplate was V1 PSK, butchered to read V1P SK.
And knowing the guy, he wasn't being ironic...
I see a red Audi driving around in Spalding with the numberplate P05H FC, or something similar.
It's awfully spaced and is supposed to represent the nickname of Peterborough football club, at a guess. Been on there for ages.
I've just remembered this one.
Was at Pizza Hut years ago (wooo) and had to nip to the loo. Went to the men's loo upstairs, out of order. Bugger. Ran back downstairs to the disabled loo and decided I had to do it there.
I'd just finished popping it out and all of a sudden, the latch on the disabled loo door dropped away from the lock and the door opened. Stood there, with a big beaming smile on his face, was a lad with Down's syndrome.
I jumped up, ran up to the door, shouted 'f
k off' or something like that and slammed it shut. I then did the paper work and other stuff and exited the loo.
As I walked back across the place to my table, I noticed the lad was sat back down and was still smiling at me. I looked back, smiled a bit and as I did so, he leaned to his parent or carer and muttered something. I hoped it wasn't along the lines of 'I met that man in the toilets', or 'that man swore at me'.
Was at Pizza Hut years ago (wooo) and had to nip to the loo. Went to the men's loo upstairs, out of order. Bugger. Ran back downstairs to the disabled loo and decided I had to do it there.
I'd just finished popping it out and all of a sudden, the latch on the disabled loo door dropped away from the lock and the door opened. Stood there, with a big beaming smile on his face, was a lad with Down's syndrome.
I jumped up, ran up to the door, shouted 'f
k off' or something like that and slammed it shut. I then did the paper work and other stuff and exited the loo.As I walked back across the place to my table, I noticed the lad was sat back down and was still smiling at me. I looked back, smiled a bit and as I did so, he leaned to his parent or carer and muttered something. I hoped it wasn't along the lines of 'I met that man in the toilets', or 'that man swore at me'.
PurpleAki said:
The Spruce goose said:
i don;t see any issues with the thread, seen a lot worse, seems pretty straightforward to me.
Naming he brand of the bag. The price of the bracelet. Asking men about a woman's watch. Who buys a watch for 2 months anyway? Whole thread is showing off IMO.Maybe calling him a cock is a bit strong but it's definitely cringey.
DrSteveBrule said:
Abbreviations of car manufacturer's names used in conversation:
Bimmer / BM
Scooby
Fezza
Lambo
Maser
For some reason 'Merc' and hearing Porsche pronounced 'Porsh' don't irritate me. The first on the list is the worst by a mile.
I've just left a job where everyone who thought they were clever referred to Avocados as 'Avo's'. It was so bad that people used to make up sentences just to use the word.Bimmer / BM
Scooby
Fezza
Lambo
Maser
For some reason 'Merc' and hearing Porsche pronounced 'Porsh' don't irritate me. The first on the list is the worst by a mile.
The Avocado line recently moved. I've never known so many smug people saying Avo this, Avo that.
They still say longer thins like Pakistani Mango though. That could have been reduced to pacman.
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