Stupid Sayings (That You Like)

[pilchardthecat]

A distant cousin of the stupid sayings thread

About 15 years ago i worked for this American fellow, who was about 60.

Whenever it got cold he'd say "st, it's a bit Pearl Harbour out there"






( "There's a bit of a nip in the air" )

[sneijder]

It's nasty nip, and I've reported you for racism.

[angusfaldo]

OP Rule number 1: Your first reply will always be a feeble attempt at a humorous derogatory comment.

[pilchardthecat]

sneijder said:

It's nasty nip, and I've reported you for racism.

Nippon just means ~Japan, and i've reported you for being Polly Toynbee.

[sneijder]

It's a bit Pearl Harbour out now actually, the missus just got in with a Nippon.

I've reported myself for sexism.

An amusing saying I've always liked is the description of a somewhat unattractive sort, as having a face like a bag of smashed crabs.

A rather fragrant person can be referred to as smelling like a warewolfs towel.

[Hammer67]

A Nodding Donkey

An ugly bird, usually with big teeth and ears who is partial to chewing on a carrot.

[/Viz]

[Blue Meanie]

My dad used to say "In goes your eye out"... No idea what it means to this day.

[Ruskie]

'Slower than a week in jail'

'Hotter than the sun' (stolen from partridge)

[Flintstone]

If you're looking for sympathy it's in the dictionary between st and syphillis.

Or, my personal favourite. fk off.

[Cogcog]

Black Adder favourite; wetter than a haddock's bathing costume.

My ex wife cited my use of that phrase in refering to her mother at our counselling sessions.

[ApexJimi]

Goes like the hammers of hell

Like ste aff a shovel

Like a pork chop at a bar mitzvah

[dave-therave]

"Built like a budgie's erection"

[voyds9]

As mad as a box of frogs.

One sandwich short of a picnic.

She looks like two ferrets fighting in a bag (describing a curvy woman in a dress too small)

[Sunglasses Ron]

A face like a melted welly

[Conian]

it's deader than disco

[NiceCupOfTea]

When talking about a classical musician playing jazz:

"swinging like a statue's cock"

[Hammer67]

"How can you be so ugly with only one head?" usually gets a response.

One I used when conversing with football refs "You couldn`t tell cowpat from Lurpak." or if that was too highbrow "st from butter"

[NoNeed]

Sweating like fred west on time team.

[snowy slopes]

One of my faves is ' as much use as tits on a fish'

[Ross1988]

Sunglasses Ron said:

A face like a melted welly

Jack Dee with a face like a....