Thursday 13th December 2012

'Performance' crossovers gain more ground

Mini and Nissan both add go-faster versions of their tall hatchback-y SUV-y sort of things

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PHers of a nervous disposition look away now - what we have here are two new additions to the sporty crossover genre, neither of which is likely to win any beauty contests. You've got to wonder too, given that the typical entry to this market is little more than a glorified hatchback with a raised centre of gravity. Garnish with chunky plastic bits to give the unrealistic impression it can handle Snowdonia on a grizzly day. Serve with a lingering bouquet of cynicism. Et voila, you've created your very own crossover.

218hp and 4wd: enough to make you want one?

Despite all this, both Mini and Nissan reckon theirs might just have what it takes to pass as hot hatches. Mini has just announced that the Paceman, its tall three-door hatch (or Sports Activity Coupe, in Mini-speak) will gain a John Cooper Works edition. It'll join the JCW Countryman - its five-door equivalent - in a two-pronged attempt to bring a bit of performance car cred to the crossover genre. Like its sibling, the JCW Paceman will be fitted with a 218hp 1.6-litre that'll feature a twin-scroll turbo, direct injection and variable valve timing. I'll also get Mini's ALL4 four-wheel-drive system as standard and a six-speed manual gearbox. So, assuming Mini manages to work its usual magic on the chassis and steering, it has the potential to be rather good. If you can live with the slightly wonky styling, of course.

Well, it is different, at least.

Well, it is different, at least. While the bods at Mini have been busy giving the Paceman some more pace, Nissan has announced pricing for its new Juke Nismo. The Juke is ... well, let's be kind here and call its styling 'a bit Marmite'. The Nismo version certainly hasn't softened up any of the base car's quirkiness, either, with a GT-R-esque front bumper and a socking great faux diffuser at the rear. Like the Paceman, the Juke Nismo comes with a 1.6-litre petrol turbo, here offering 200hp, but unlike the Paceman, you won't be able to buy it as a four-wheel drive manual. Instead, somewhat disappointingly, you can opt for a two-wheel drive manual or a four-wheel drive with a CVT 'box. Oh. Well, at least it'll be quite racy inside, with lashings of suede and Alcantara and special Nismo sports seats. And at £19,995, it won't break the bank. Mind you, with the Focus ST giving you 50hp more for just £2,000 extra, it's not exactly a bargain, either

Hark, is that the sound of knives being sharpened?

 

 

 

[zebedee]

"218hp and 4wd. Enough to make you want one?"

God no. My eyes still work.

[zebedee]

johnnnnnnyy said:

To all the 'nob' chanters, its well documented 90% of the 4x4's on the road never go off road, Ranger Rover acknowledging this with the new model being more of a limo. These chanters are the same guys sitting in the pub puffing their chests and willy waving about their BHP and carbon fibre, when again 90% of these performance cars never touch a race track. These being the same people posting from Version 25.1.87 of the latest OS on the newest PDA recently synced with the turbo fantastic pentium processor with retina display on their PC that will never control the space ship they are watching on their 60" LED wifi enabled TV while slipping on their designer suit and cheap after shave. 'Nob' the mini driver hails as he drives past……Welcome to the 21st century of accessorising.

the bhp and carbon fibre make a difference every time you press the pedal, but the extra flabbiness of these cars is genuinely useless in most cases.

[zebedee]

jbi said:

This does not have to be the case...





nissan altima is not bad looking either

Edited by jbi on Monday 17th December 12:48

agree with the sentiment, totally disagree with the examples!

[zebedee]

vsonix said:

...then everybody and his dog gets an SUV/SoftRoader for exactly this reason then it's back to square one since now 80% of vehicles on the road are of similar proportions, and everyone else who has a normal car can't see round/over/past you. What's next, automotive stilts? Why not just have a normal size car and a periscope?

FWIW I think they're both hideous, the Juke looks like it was designed by someone who really wanted a Sport Multipla and the Mini is, frankly, offensive. On the flip side they've made the Evoque and X1/X3 look half decent by comparison.

Edited by vsonix on Monday 17th December 20:09

Nothing can make an X1 look anything other than utterly horrendous in my view, especially in the very appropriate 'turd brown'. I saw my first one in Monaco a couple of years ago and even in that setting there was simply no forgiving it!

[zebedee]

Chris71 said:

Well done to PH for resisting the obvious 'Performance crossovers gaining traction' pun.

The thing I don't quite get with these cars is they're almost always aimed at affluent family types who could afford to get a family bus and something to play around in at the weekends. I guess a MINI Paceman just has more badge appeal at the crèche than turning up in a second hand B-Max with an Elise in the garage for weekends...

Exactly, so fine for the sad, sad individuals who seem to place more on assuming other people give a toss what badge they drive than actually sorting their lives out and getting what they actually want for themselves.

(By the way I admit that some people buy Jukes and Pacemans for themselves, so fall outside that category but people who care so much about image and appearance, well I have no time for them really).

Yours, someone with a secondhand estate car and an Elise in the garage (for driving, not for posing).

[zebedee]

jbi said:

says the guy in the Renault Clio

A Clio isn't really trying to make a statement IMHO so not a fair comparison. I neither love nor hate the 300C but it certainly can't be described as 'beautiful' as the person who stuck the pictures up suggested, nor are the others in my view.

[zebedee]

Chris71 said:

Fine as they are, but putting Bentley badges on - as I've seen twice around here - should be a hanging offence.

They do what?!

[zebedee]

dukebox9reg said:

This is the colour I went for with the newish option of black headlights

What exactly about this car made you want it rather than anything else?

[zebedee]

dukebox9reg said:

Smallish car, 4wd, petrol, decent fuel economy and fun to chuck down the road. A quashcow etc maybe a bit more practical but there is nothing interesting about their engine line up and handling dynamics and If you look to a audi Q3 etc your looking at a lot more money and personally I think it's bland. X1 is a munter, there's nothing else that really ticks the boxes. 350ltr boot, 5 doors, comfortable can seat 4, 5 at a push, 182bhp, 4wd and an obtainable 40mpg. Its also a giggle to drive. I'll be the first one to admit it wont win any design awards but it's a lot better looking than the X1 and in my opinion the predictable Q3.

A car that size can only seat 5 at a push? It looks enormous, I would have thought most hatches could seat 5 relatively easily (but I haven't had a hatch for over a decade or been one of 5 in one for a while!). If it handles well fair enough and at least you admit it is aesthetically challenged. Why was 4x4 important to you out of interest?