Exhaust farty popping noises ?

[J4CKO]

So many modern quick cars do the farty pop noises on gearshifts, it seems to encourage dickish behaviour to get passers by to look, anyone else noticed this ? no problem with a bit of exhaust noise but this does seem to make some drivers want to trigger the noise for attention, does it only happen under load ?

Was at the airport at a car even at the viewing park, and some pillock in an A45 went hammering across the pedestrian area making the racket, then across the car park and then absolutely hammered it down the approach road past people walking.

Same today, retail park car park, RS3 driven way too fast making a noise, then a MK2 Focus RS.

Go through any city/town centre and you see geezers in similar cars doing this, I suppose we have all done it but a sports exhaust will make a noise without going fast, have seen similar cars that dont make the "brapp" on upshift, can you turn it off or drive without it happening ?

[J4CKO]

Alucidnation said:

Don't any of your cars do this OP?

Mine will do the dump valve "tshh" and wastegate noises but I dont drive it round car parks at speed.

Not jealous, I like a nice fast hatch etc but blasting through a busy car park isnt a great idea really is it ?

[J4CKO]

iphonedyou said:

Can't turn it off and can drive without it happening (obviously enough, or you'd be hearing I hundreds of times a day).

Wasnt sure if some have some kind of active exhaust or something.

Is it mapped in to do that, is there a purpose other than making it sound sporty ?

[J4CKO]

I was there for ages whilst Halfords made a balls of fitting my stereo

Apart from the farty exhausts, there was an R8 making a racket and a minor parking disagreement resulted some bellend in a sheddy mk1 Focus revving it to the limiter and setting off in a frenzy of squealing tyres and as much tyre smoke as it could manage and carried on accelerating.

Reinforces my usual policy of avoiding retail parks, seemed like a good idea getting a fairly fiddly stereo fitting done for thirty quid, but three hours passed and the rear speakers dont work, it pops when I change channel and the fitter forgot to install the Bluetooth mic, and then I went to the gym and left the lights on and flattened what was left of the battery after three hours of the ignition being on.

[J4CKO]

Meridius said:

The VAG 2.0T isnt the best sounding engine at the best of times and those 'DSG farts' sound awful, embarrassingly awful infact, enough that if I was in the market for one I would deliberately buy a manual just to avoid it.

There is an R32 near me that has had an exhaust and presumably a map fitted to make it backfire as much as possible, except it backfires at normal road speeds... every time this thing accelerates away from lights, a junction, from slowing down behind a turning car BLOP PLOP BLOPLBPLPOPLBOBLOPBBLBOPPLPOPLOP... and I am sure the owner thinks it sounds amazing and everyone is looking at him because he is obviously the coolest guy on the roads. No idea how the owner can live with it, it would drive me mental. The R32 is an interesting and unique sounding engine too but this idiot has ruined it with his daft exhaust and map.

There was a guy in an R32 as well, sounded good but he was going a bit quick, then parked in a disabled space without a badge or any obvious incapacity other than being a tt.

[J4CKO]

mike74 said:

The first time I heard an rs3 I was a cross between massively underwhelmed at the monotonous engine note and amused at the hilarious fake dsg farts. It was basically...

drone,fart. drone,fart drooooone,fart.

Sounds a bit like me then an RS3 then

[J4CKO]

Tuvra said:

I seen an RS7 in Manchester the other day, guy floors it and lifts off, as he lifted the car made a ridiculously loud crackling sound for about 3 seconds.

I thought it was brilliant! Then again I'm not a miserable old sod stuck in the 1990's

Dont get me wrong, I am not against noisy exhausts (had a 350Z with an aftermarket Stainless system on) , just feel that it is encouraging some to drive faster and more aggressively to trigger it in inappropriate situations, time and a place.

Thing is the 350Z sounded pretty good without needing to put my foot down, in fact sometimes I wanted it to shut up as you wanted a bit of acceleration and it sounded like the car equivalent of Brian Blessed shouting when you wanted quiet progress.

[J4CKO]

daemon said:

J4CKO said:

Dont get me wrong, I am not against noisy exhausts (had a 350Z with an aftermarket Stainless system on) , just feel that it is encouraging some to drive faster and more aggressively to trigger it in inappropriate situations, time and a place.

Oh come on, this is Pistonheads.

If you want to sit around being po faced about what it might encourage people to do, can i suggest mumsnet or BRAKE?

http://www.brake.org.uk/

All we need now is a "think of the children" and we'll have the full set. We've already had someone mention PCP finance....

Edited by daemon on Monday 20th November 11:08

You mention a couple of cliches, then pull out the Brake/Mumsnet suggestion.

[J4CKO]

Shnozz said:

It brightens my day more than a Tesla or thudding of a diesel engine, fake or not. A little GP Mini passed me by the other night with epic flatulence and made me chuckle rather than curse.

Minis do sound pretty good, I sold a 2002 Mini One for a friend recently and even that made some quite sporty noises, for 90 bhp anyway.

[J4CKO]

HedgeyGedgey said:

I'll explain how cars do it, VAG have just tweeked onto it and made 4 cylinder turbos (that everyone moans about boring) sound exciting.

The part circled black is the pop and bang part, this is the ignition map. So between 3000-7000rpm at very light load (load is the top, goes to 320 where anything over 100 is on boost. 260 load for example is roughly 1.6bar boost) The ignition timing is -20 degrees in the circled area, so when you're off the throttle between those revs thats what the timing will be. The fuel map will be slightly richer in this same area too. This will give anti lag type pops and bangs, blows the baffles out the exhaust and actually damages the turbo. As an example WRC cars run -50 degrees and with a throttle kicker will generate around a bar of boost on idle

Thanks for that, love the tech behind it, so I can correctly point out to the folk doing this in the retail park car park that they are actually quite retarded

[J4CKO]

DoubleD said:

cerb4.5lee said:

J4CKO said:

Apart from the farty exhausts, there was an R8 making a racket and a minor parking disagreement resulted some bellend in a sheddy mk1 Focus revving it to the limiter and setting off in a frenzy of squealing tyres and as much tyre smoke as it could manage and carried on accelerating.

I was at Meadowhall a few weeks back and a chap in his V10 R8 was driving around the car park hitting the throttle and backing off, and it was popping and banging like crazy, he just kept circling the car park doing it.

My Mrs said what's that clown doing?...and I said if my car sounded as nice as his did I'd be doing the same!! I do like show off exhausts though and I loved my TVR for the racket it made.

I like a decent exhaust and love to hear tgem. But driving round and round a car park is a very sad thing to do.

Yeah, I like to hear them, when walking the dog at night for example you hear all manner of interesting stuff but never really in the right place at the right time to see them pass, the A34 Wilmslow bypass has some serious sounding stuff being wound out, including my manky old TT....

[J4CKO]

Some Gump said:

22 thousand posts.

Are they ball man ng about being pwned in car parks, or just this thread?

In English ?

[J4CKO]

daemon said:

Ari said:

Rawwr said:

daemon said:

Primarily :-

(a) if they're genuinely "upset" by a car making a noise as it passes, then they have the problem not me
(b) they really need to look at the real problems in this world and get upset at those.
(b) they need to get over themselves.

That sounds like quite a selfish position.

It is indeed.

"It's fine for me to annoy people provided there are people doing worse things".

An interesting viewpoint into the chav mentality though. They could (and presumably do) apply it to almost anything chav, dropping litter, playing unsociably loud music, queue jumping, not picking up their dog's st...

Edited by Ari on Monday 20th November 12:13

The car is as per it came from the factory.

If people are "outraged" or "annoyed" because it makes a sound they dont like when it passes them, then i stand by what i said - they need to get over themselves.

Loving how someone having a viewpoint you dont agree with makes them a "chav".

Personally the noises dont bother me at all, what the thread was about was the fact that *some* owners of cars that do it seek to trigger the sound in places where it requires more speed than is appropriate which is what I was seeing the other day.

However, if that means I am boring and got "Pwned" whilst stood waiting for Halfords to finish ballsing up my stereo then so be it, the place was heaving with people and really the only way round is to trickle, not sure how fast you need to go to trigger the noise on an up shift but it is faster than is sane in that environment judging by all the folk that looked round, a bit shocked at the speed, particularly when the RS3 passed.

It looks like this has become a thing in town and city centres, perhaps part of the reason these kinds of cars are getting nicked as well ?

Its the new version of Nova with a fart cannon, but a lot lot faster, plus, you just know if there is an incident they will probably attempt to scuttle off to avoid any consequences.

[J4CKO]

daemon said:

J4CKO said:

Personally the noises dont bother me at all, what the thread was about was the fact that *some* owners of cars that do it seek to trigger the sound in places where it requires more speed than is appropriate which is what I was seeing the other day.

However, if that means I am boring and got "Pwned" whilst stood waiting for Halfords to finish ballsing up my stereo then so be it, the place was heaving with people and really the only way round is to trickle, not sure how fast you need to go to trigger the noise on an up shift but it is faster than is sane in that environment judging by all the folk that looked round, a bit shocked at the speed, particularly when the RS3 passed.

It looks like this has become a thing in town and city centres, perhaps part of the reason these kinds of cars are getting nicked as well ?

Its the new version of Nova with a fart cannon, but a lot lot faster, plus, you just know if there is an incident they will probably attempt to scuttle off to avoid any consequences.

I wholly agree. The sort of speed i'd need to be doing or the way i'd need to be driving to envoke it would be crazy around town.

The A45 doesnt bang and fart around town unless being driven wholly inappropriately which i dont do and would not advocate people doing.

However if it happens to bang when i'm overtaking some silly old bint doing 30MPH in a 60 and shes "outraged", frankly not one fk do i give, but apparently - and surprisingly on a motoring forum - to some by enjoying my car and actually driving it on occasionally doesnt mark me out as an enthusiast, it makes me a chav.

Edited by daemon on Tuesday 21st November 15:04

Yeah, time and a place, quite entitled to overtake if its clear, people get weird about being overtaken, to the point they hog lane two on a dual carriageway, I an a dyed in the wool car enthusiast who likes noisy stuff, wish I wasn't but stuck with it so if I think something is anti social it is probably pretty bad

We have more of an insight knowing the background and car culture, sometimes non car people think something is going fast as it makes a noise, any noise but we can perhaps understand more, and the farts do tend to encourage more acceleration/speed than the situation calls for.


I am fully capable of being a nuisance myself but I do try to reign it in as offending someone a little, is a bit different to flattening them on the way out of TK Maxx !

[J4CKO]

Not a car but was working with two engineers testing the electronics and avionics, me and one chap in the cockpit and one in the avionics bay below on an old airliner yesterday, playing cockpit alarm noises on my phone made them jump a little



On your A45, surely at a steady 37 mph it just makes a normal exhaust noise ?