Wedding nonsense
Discussion
vinnie83 said:
-Comedy table center pieces so big you can't see the person you're trying to talk to across the table.
I agree. Much the same at loads of restaurants though.
-One wedding had two bands play
What's the problem with that?
-ridiculous amounts of food
Would you prefer little choice and not enough? Remember that they have to account for every guests requirements and tastes
-Customised sweets with the event and names on and other daft "favors"/freebies.
You object to being given free chocolates and freebies?
-An ice sculpture with the seating plan in it. Why? especially as the morning after we found it slung, unceremoniously, into a near by hedge.
Because they liked the look of it?
-Presents for kids who did the decent thing and kept schtum for 5 minutes during the ceremony as a well done.
You're objecting to the fact that they were kind and considerate enough to give presents to children?
-videographers doing a "marryoke". Or in other words being forced against your wishes to sing and dance in front of a camera for the married couples later amusement. Not being extrovert in anyway, this was seriously uncomfortable for me.
Admittedly this is very annoying, especially when a million watt light is shone in your face. But why feel uncomfortable? Just don't dance.
-Comedy custom t-shirts for the wedding party the day after
Never seen this.
-Holding it at some posh country house on the condition you get most of your guests to fork out £200 a night to stay there as well.
We really don't care if you don't turn up, believe me, our wedding isn't about you.
-Starting at 12 and going on into the small hours...far to long.
Assuming that there's a registry and reception party, how would you suggest it is all crammed into half a day? Would you prefer having to set aside two separate dates instead?
-A photobooth thingies that see most of the guests queuing outside of for the majority of the night. Or getting everyone a polaroid/dispoable to take gash, unusable pictures with. All of which will be at the dinner table.
You know this is an optional activity, right?
-A huge wedding cake + cup cakes + cheese + sweet stalls
Again, complaining about free food and deserts?
You come across as rather selfish and inconsiderate to be honest.
As someone who is currently planning a wedding with the intention of trying NOT to be excessive and keep the day as short as possible so as not to inconvenience guests, if any of my friends or family said the things you have, I would not be inviting them.
Wishing to celebrate something that you are happy about and having loved ones around you is something to be appreciated, it's an invite, not a summons, and I would be extremely pissed off if someone accepted my invite only to attend and complain about everything.
ETA - Having read that back, it seems clear I've taken your comments a little personally, having had some ungreatful family members complaining about how we're doing things.... sorry if my response was a little harsh.
But I still think some of the points you made were a bit silly - like complaining about the gestures, gifts and food choice - I think these are all things to be glad to be had!
No offence taken. Carry on as you were. Its only gobsting on the internet! I agree. Much the same at loads of restaurants though.
-One wedding had two bands play
What's the problem with that?
-ridiculous amounts of food
Would you prefer little choice and not enough? Remember that they have to account for every guests requirements and tastes
-Customised sweets with the event and names on and other daft "favors"/freebies.
You object to being given free chocolates and freebies?
-An ice sculpture with the seating plan in it. Why? especially as the morning after we found it slung, unceremoniously, into a near by hedge.
Because they liked the look of it?
-Presents for kids who did the decent thing and kept schtum for 5 minutes during the ceremony as a well done.
You're objecting to the fact that they were kind and considerate enough to give presents to children?
-videographers doing a "marryoke". Or in other words being forced against your wishes to sing and dance in front of a camera for the married couples later amusement. Not being extrovert in anyway, this was seriously uncomfortable for me.
Admittedly this is very annoying, especially when a million watt light is shone in your face. But why feel uncomfortable? Just don't dance.
-Comedy custom t-shirts for the wedding party the day after
Never seen this.
-Holding it at some posh country house on the condition you get most of your guests to fork out £200 a night to stay there as well.
We really don't care if you don't turn up, believe me, our wedding isn't about you.
-Starting at 12 and going on into the small hours...far to long.
Assuming that there's a registry and reception party, how would you suggest it is all crammed into half a day? Would you prefer having to set aside two separate dates instead?
-A photobooth thingies that see most of the guests queuing outside of for the majority of the night. Or getting everyone a polaroid/dispoable to take gash, unusable pictures with. All of which will be at the dinner table.
You know this is an optional activity, right?
-A huge wedding cake + cup cakes + cheese + sweet stalls
Again, complaining about free food and deserts?
You come across as rather selfish and inconsiderate to be honest.
As someone who is currently planning a wedding with the intention of trying NOT to be excessive and keep the day as short as possible so as not to inconvenience guests, if any of my friends or family said the things you have, I would not be inviting them.
Wishing to celebrate something that you are happy about and having loved ones around you is something to be appreciated, it's an invite, not a summons, and I would be extremely pissed off if someone accepted my invite only to attend and complain about everything.
ETA - Having read that back, it seems clear I've taken your comments a little personally, having had some ungreatful family members complaining about how we're doing things.... sorry if my response was a little harsh.
But I still think some of the points you made were a bit silly - like complaining about the gestures, gifts and food choice - I think these are all things to be glad to be had!
Edited by vinnie83 on Tuesday 26th August 21:15
Our wedding had two bands play. It was awesome. I think its the only wedding I've heard of that's had Metallica popped into a set.
Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
Dog Star said:
Woah! Classy! Any pics (of the car)?
There were some in the 'period classic pictures thread' thread in the Classics forum, but they've disappeared from the host site as they were a few years old. It was a jaded black HK500, but I was chuffed to be able to get any Facel Vega.
TwigtheWonderkid said:
In my experience, there is a reverse correlation between the cost of the wedding and the length of the marriage. The more expensive, the shorter.
This is definitely the case in my experience, it is almost as if they are compensating for something.I have a photo of my wedding with us with our closest friends and out of the 7 couples all 7 (including myself) are now divorced or separated. None of these marriages lasted more than 10 years.
I got married in Vegas, £5000 all in including the holiday afterwards.
No hassle, only decisions I had to make were what colour roses for the wife and what songs the pianist had to play. Didn't even have to pay for international phone calls as it was all done on Skype.
I advised the minister to "keep it short and don't mention God".
I appear to be as married as anyone who spent £20000+ on an afternoon's piss up in a marquee.
No hassle, only decisions I had to make were what colour roses for the wife and what songs the pianist had to play. Didn't even have to pay for international phone calls as it was all done on Skype.
I advised the minister to "keep it short and don't mention God".
I appear to be as married as anyone who spent £20000+ on an afternoon's piss up in a marquee.
doogz said:
Burnham said:
Our wedding had two bands play. It was awesome. I think its the only wedding I've heard of that's had Metallica popped into a set.
Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
Our first dance was Metallica.Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
speedysoprano said:
John D. said:
This is so true.
A dress for one day? That'll be £2.5k please.
I've never got that. My whole outfit (dress, jacket, shoes, hat) cost less than £250. A dress for one day? That'll be £2.5k please.
I just bought a new shirt and tie from M&S. Job done.
Burnham said:
doogz said:
Burnham said:
Our wedding had two bands play. It was awesome. I think its the only wedding I've heard of that's had Metallica popped into a set.
Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
Our first dance was Metallica.Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
Burnham said:
My missus went window shopping for a dress, came back with a £250 display model that she was over the moon with. Why anyone would spend thousands on fabric is beyond me.
I just bought a new shirt and tie from M&S. Job done.
Your missus is a smart woman. It's so much more important to find something you love and feel brilliant in than it is to spend ££££ or buy designer labels.I just bought a new shirt and tie from M&S. Job done.
Actually, my husband only bought a new shirt and tie (from the Hawes and Curtis discount store in Tottenham) which cost him about £30. Wore a jacket and trousers he already had. He looked terrific.
speedysoprano said:
Burnham said:
My missus went window shopping for a dress, came back with a £250 display model that she was over the moon with. Why anyone would spend thousands on fabric is beyond me.
I just bought a new shirt and tie from M&S. Job done.
Your missus is a smart woman. It's so much more important to find something you love and feel brilliant in than it is to spend ££££ or buy designer labels.I just bought a new shirt and tie from M&S. Job done.
Actually, my husband only bought a new shirt and tie (from the Hawes and Curtis discount store in Tottenham) which cost him about £30. Wore a jacket and trousers he already had. He looked terrific.
DoubleSix said:
Burnham said:
doogz said:
Burnham said:
Our wedding had two bands play. It was awesome. I think its the only wedding I've heard of that's had Metallica popped into a set.
Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
Our first dance was Metallica.Otherwise, I'm in agreement about all the pomp and ceremony. I usually dislike weddings, so we made sure ours was pretty simple, no drama.
It doesn't have to be traditional, and it can be a beautiful day without having to cost the earth if you don't get tied up with all the ste that goes with them usually.
I invited my family to my wedding, plus some freinds (in reality, i invited all my friends, and they all came...all 6 of them!). My wife invited her family, and some of her friends (she has loads more friends than me). Most people we invited turned up, some had silly excuses ("oh, we're on holiday that time" - invites were sent out 12 months in advance).
We found a nice venue (restored barn), and hunted around for good deals on things like flowers. Our main focus of spending was food and entertainment. The food was brilliant (in the evening, the cheapest thing to have was a hog roast...a hog roast i tells you! it was the cheapest and by far the most impressive!) and we hired a band to play for us, who were really really good.
All in all, it cost us a fair bit BUT we felt it was done right. Somehow, at some point, a conga started.
My wedding day is one of the happiest days of my life. The honeymoon was terrible though...I was taken ill and spent it in hospital instead of italy!
We found a nice venue (restored barn), and hunted around for good deals on things like flowers. Our main focus of spending was food and entertainment. The food was brilliant (in the evening, the cheapest thing to have was a hog roast...a hog roast i tells you! it was the cheapest and by far the most impressive!) and we hired a band to play for us, who were really really good.
All in all, it cost us a fair bit BUT we felt it was done right. Somehow, at some point, a conga started.
My wedding day is one of the happiest days of my life. The honeymoon was terrible though...I was taken ill and spent it in hospital instead of italy!
TwigtheWonderkid said:
In my experience, there is a reverse correlation between the cost of the wedding and the length of the marriage. The more expensive, the shorter.
Instinctively I'd agree with you, but a slightly different stat was in this Sunday's Telegraph.Apparently the larger the number of wedding guests you have the "higher quality" your marriage will be, though exactly what that means I have no idea.
Lost soul said:
Otispunkmeyer said:
Easier said than done. I bet there are 1000's of blokes who want that who then get steam rolled by their OH's who get carried away with planning "their" day. And I mean their as in singular. He's just along for the ride.
I am with you on this point I got married 10 days ago and it was a laid back effort, but all the better for it. Okay, there was a church ceremony, but the church is next door to the pub. We then went to the beach for a few photos, a drink and some time to ourselves. After that, it was back to the marquee in our neighbour's field for a bbq (the meat from a local butcher, salads and veggie option by me). There was a drink tent where people could help themselves and plenty of wine on the tables (courtesy of an offer in Tesco and a family members 10% discount card) and when dinner was done, an ice cream van showed up for desert. As there are stables in the field, some of the kids went on the horses for a bit, our dogs and the neighbours dogs came over for a bit. We had my mp3 player through the PA system (borrowed from the best man), then a band, followed by one member of the band dj-ing afterwards.
Our photographers are friends of mine, which saved us a fortune. Other than some guy trying to rip us off for a bbq, the price of photographers for a wedding is probably the most ridiculous price I came across. Some wanted £1200-1500 just for up until we left the church. My wife's dress was a bargain, a local wedding shop was closing down and she got a £1500 dress for £250. Very sensible as the bottom was covered in dirt within 5 minutes of getting to the field.
Our photographers are friends of mine, which saved us a fortune. Other than some guy trying to rip us off for a bbq, the price of photographers for a wedding is probably the most ridiculous price I came across. Some wanted £1200-1500 just for up until we left the church. My wife's dress was a bargain, a local wedding shop was closing down and she got a £1500 dress for £250. Very sensible as the bottom was covered in dirt within 5 minutes of getting to the field.
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