What has your "friend" been up to?
Discussion
On Saturday my friend witnessed appalling reversing into a parking bay of an expensive Merc in a DIY centre car park and then the tatted chav driver got out with his equally tatted chavette mol and walked around the car to check it was ok and not too near anything remotely likely to touch it. My friend then ended up in an altercation with said chav just for smiling.
Apparently smiling at the scene of reversing is an offence in Chavworld.
Apparently smiling at the scene of reversing is an offence in Chavworld.
"Ha! I think that some of our more uptight members could post in this thread along the lines of "My friend has been posting nonsense on PH about how people don't "deserve" to be on PH". Whut? Is there an entrance exam, or something?
How about "My friend has been making an arse of himself by posting that he knows what everyone else on PH thinks, that they all agree with him, and that anyone who disagrees with his views is like Hitler, only worse".
Dudes, this is just a light hearted thread about nonsense. Anyway, cars are just cars, and public spaces are public spaces. If you get so twitchy about your precious Gods, maybe wrap them in blankets and never take them out of their air conditioned garages. Best not to go onto an actual road or anything. Heck, a stone might hit the car, or it might get some dust on it, oh noes!
How about "My friend has been making an arse of himself by posting that he knows what everyone else on PH thinks, that they all agree with him, and that anyone who disagrees with his views is like Hitler, only worse".
Dudes, this is just a light hearted thread about nonsense. Anyway, cars are just cars, and public spaces are public spaces. If you get so twitchy about your precious Gods, maybe wrap them in blankets and never take them out of their air conditioned garages. Best not to go onto an actual road or anything. Heck, a stone might hit the car, or it might get some dust on it, oh noes!
Back on topic, my friend absent mindedly left a half eaten apple in the passenger footwell of his old Triumph jalopy, which he then parked up for a while. Following the recent mild and damp weather, my friend has found that the apple has evolved into some sort of sentient life form that appears to be in the early stages of a rudimentary civilisation. Some local hippies have now established a camp in the footwell to protect the simple creatures from having their habitat destroyed by my friend wielding a J Cloth and a can of Vim. The tense standoff continues.
Edited by anonymous-user on Tuesday 12th January 21:18
My friend is fairly sure from some telltale signs that there is a mouse living in the boot of his ancient and crusty Jag. This is sort of OK, as it's a bit parky out, and the critter needs somewhere to kip, but the wiring in the Jag is way over complex and there are lots of annoying electrical widgets in the boot, so now my friend is worrying that the mouse will nom all the wires and make the car go FOOM.
My friend owns a not very valuable but quite rare and moderately interesting car from the early 1980s. That car has been driving itself around, in the circumstances explained below.
My friend lives in a house with a large gravelled parking area that has a slight incline. My friend, distracted by the unexpected arrival of a cousin, did not, as he usually does, park his 80s car in gear when he returned from a trip. He also failed to haul the handbrake lever high enough. My friend then had to get up the next morning at 4 AM because of a work faff. He was curious to see from his kitchen window an unexpected yellow numberplate on the far side of his parking area, and wondered who his nocturnal visitor might be. Then he realised that his Rover had gone a roving.
The heap had rolled to a halt where the ground levels out, and had not hit anything on the way. It was partly blocking the gateway to my friend's place, and a large fuel oil lorry was due in at 0730 to fill up the heating oil tank. My friend hopped in to the viking car but could not get it to start, probably because in his flustery and pre-coffee 4.15 AM state he flooded it (it has autochoke carbs), or whatever. He was also conscious of the fact that the car was now close by two of the neighbouring cottages, and my friend hates to p
s off his neighbours. He looked for a tow rope, but realised that both his tow ropes were in his Landy, which was not at home at the time (there is a story about that as well).
After a pause and some coffee, my friend was able to start the car by engaging reverse gear and bump starting it to life, and drive it back to a parking space.
My friend is lucky that the wandering car didn't hit any of his other cars or anything else solid while on its midnight frolic. He dodged a second bullet when bump starting the car, as his modern (ish) car was positioned close to the escaped vehicle with lights on to illuminate the rescue efforts, and my idiot friend almost reversed into the modern car, but stopped just short.
Verdict: utter spamhead.
My friend lives in a house with a large gravelled parking area that has a slight incline. My friend, distracted by the unexpected arrival of a cousin, did not, as he usually does, park his 80s car in gear when he returned from a trip. He also failed to haul the handbrake lever high enough. My friend then had to get up the next morning at 4 AM because of a work faff. He was curious to see from his kitchen window an unexpected yellow numberplate on the far side of his parking area, and wondered who his nocturnal visitor might be. Then he realised that his Rover had gone a roving.
The heap had rolled to a halt where the ground levels out, and had not hit anything on the way. It was partly blocking the gateway to my friend's place, and a large fuel oil lorry was due in at 0730 to fill up the heating oil tank. My friend hopped in to the viking car but could not get it to start, probably because in his flustery and pre-coffee 4.15 AM state he flooded it (it has autochoke carbs), or whatever. He was also conscious of the fact that the car was now close by two of the neighbouring cottages, and my friend hates to p
s off his neighbours. He looked for a tow rope, but realised that both his tow ropes were in his Landy, which was not at home at the time (there is a story about that as well).After a pause and some coffee, my friend was able to start the car by engaging reverse gear and bump starting it to life, and drive it back to a parking space.
My friend is lucky that the wandering car didn't hit any of his other cars or anything else solid while on its midnight frolic. He dodged a second bullet when bump starting the car, as his modern (ish) car was positioned close to the escaped vehicle with lights on to illuminate the rescue efforts, and my idiot friend almost reversed into the modern car, but stopped just short.
Verdict: utter spamhead.
Edited by anonymous-user on Thursday 4th February 15:37
My friend prefers the definition that, to be a car, a vehicle must have a distributor. Coil on plug ignition and so on is, he thinks, the work of Beelzebub and all his fiery fiends. My friend's modern (ish) car is almost a computer on wheels, but it is 14 years old and is of a type that was was designed in the early 90s. This means that it is almost a car. It also cost my friend exactly zero pounds to acquire.
He says, citing Groucho Marx: "These, sir, are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others."
He says, citing Groucho Marx: "These, sir, are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others."
Breadvan72 said:
My friend had gone down to six points but is now back up to nine and has to drive like his Nan until at least February. He is a tt.
This has just happened to my friend again. He went from nine points down to six. The very next day, he hooned too much and got another three pointer. On each occasion, and entirely without planning this, three of his points expired the day before he got himself in the frame for three more. So that is twice in one year that my idiot friend has escaped a totting up ban by one day. He says that he really has learned his lesson and will hoon less. Verdict: tt.t.My friend has been looking after a rare classic car, which he ostensibly co owns with two other dudes, but which he is mainly just storing pending one or other of the guys taking it on to keep and maybe restore.
Being a careful custodian, my friend has so far managed to make the sunroof handle fall off by fiddling with it needlessly, and has also clouted a fencepost while driving the car too fast out of his driveway. Luckily the car is made of girders and so the fencepost lost.
Being a careful custodian, my friend has so far managed to make the sunroof handle fall off by fiddling with it needlessly, and has also clouted a fencepost while driving the car too fast out of his driveway. Luckily the car is made of girders and so the fencepost lost.
My friend's Mum was driving my friend through a village with a known speed camera setup, warning him not to hoon through it when he was out in his Dolomite Sprint later that day. As she was saying this, she was flagged down by the copper whose colleague, posted a short distance back, had just zapped her for 38 in a 30. My friend's mum was in her 1.4 Fiesta that does not like going up hills. She did the speed awareness course.
My friend did indeed go out in his Dolly Sprint later that day, but all that he got from the cozzer was a smile and a wave, as Plod seemed to like the car.
My friend did indeed go out in his Dolly Sprint later that day, but all that he got from the cozzer was a smile and a wave, as Plod seemed to like the car.
This dude's "friend" has been getting it right:-
https://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&...
https://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&...
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