One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 4

[Rawwr]

Blown2CV said:

so you were originally trying to merge too early and holding up traffic behind you? Otherwise there would not have been space in front to "boot it" so cleverly into?

Always leave an avenue of escape.

[Blown2CV]

Rawwr said:

Blown2CV said:

so you were originally trying to merge too early and holding up traffic behind you? Otherwise there would not have been space in front to "boot it" so cleverly into?

Always leave an avenue of escape.

never accelerate through danger, is another thing people say.

In reality you are meant to merge at the merge point. If you leave loads of room in front of you which seemingly would be sufficient for you to accelerate and pass 2 cars, whilst not endangering anything in front of you (or yourself) then you're probably trying to merge too early, especially if there were more than 2 cars between you and the merge point, as could well have been the case.

[captain_cynic]

Blown2CV said:

Rawwr said:

Blown2CV said:

so you were originally trying to merge too early and holding up traffic behind you? Otherwise there would not have been space in front to "boot it" so cleverly into?

Always leave an avenue of escape.

never accelerate through danger, is another thing people say.

In reality you are meant to merge at the merge point. If you leave loads of room in front of you which seemingly would be sufficient for you to accelerate and pass 2 cars, whilst not endangering anything in front of you (or yourself) then you're probably trying to merge too early, especially if there were more than 2 cars between you and the merge point, as could well have been the case.

What annoys me about merging is that when a queue has formed and crawling along at 5 mph no one thinks of making a gap in front of them until they actually get to the merge point. Thus we end up with a stop-start situation as people realise they need to start making a gap far too late.

Traffic would flow more smoothly if people started making a gap before getting to the merge point so we actually look like a zip before merging like one.

[Alex_225]

numtumfutunch said:

Double wammy of dashcam and mobile phone in direct field of vision = knob

Definitely double 'knobish' points for that driver!! I have a dashcam that's tucked right up behind the rear view mirror so it doesn't get in the way. Don't understand people who place them right in the middle!

Saw a car the other day with dashcams front and back but with both of them lit up compeltely. Mine turns the LCD screen off so doesn't light the car up. This moron had them both lit up, nice distraction at the front and back of the car!

[Pica-Pica]

I have experienced quite a few 3 lanes down to 1 lately. No ‘merge in turn’ signs, but everyone seems to act sensibly - driving reasonably up to the end of that lane, and people letting them in. I was pleasantly surprised. (I was in lane two, and observing how the closing lane 3 drivers behaved and how lane 2 drivers reacted).

[WarrenB]

Strong Horse said:

People who dont want to merge in turn.

Theres always some under endowed gentleman. Just as you have positioned your car to the rear of the car in front in the opposite lane and are getting ready to merge. Some idiot storms from way back and hangs onto the bumper of the car you were going to merge behind.

One time this happened I dropped into 2nd and booted it so I shot past both the idiot cutting in and the car I was originally merging behind just before the road narrowed. The look on the mans face who was trying to block me front merging was that of such utter comtempt haha.

If someone is trying to merge behind me from another lane and I can see the driver of the car behind me keeping as close as he can to my rear bumper to stop them getting in, if there's enough space infront of me I'll just stop and let them come in front of me instead.

It is a rare bit of magic though when two lanes merge and everyone slips together into one without stopping and goes on their way.

[Blown2CV]

WarrenB said:

Strong Horse said:

People who dont want to merge in turn.

Theres always some under endowed gentleman. Just as you have positioned your car to the rear of the car in front in the opposite lane and are getting ready to merge. Some idiot storms from way back and hangs onto the bumper of the car you were going to merge behind.

One time this happened I dropped into 2nd and booted it so I shot past both the idiot cutting in and the car I was originally merging behind just before the road narrowed. The look on the mans face who was trying to block me front merging was that of such utter comtempt haha.

If someone is trying to merge behind me from another lane and I can see the driver of the car behind me keeping as close as he can to my rear bumper to stop them getting in, if there's enough space infront of me I'll just stop and let them come in front of me instead.

It is a rare bit of magic though when two lanes merge and everyone slips together into one without stopping and goes on their way.

It takes many people to make it run smoothly but it only takes one dhead to fk it up unfortunately.

[Strong Horse]

WarrenB said:

If someone is trying to merge behind me from another lane and I can see the driver of the car behind me keeping as close as he can to my rear bumper to stop them getting in, if there's enough space infront of me I'll just stop and let them come in front of me instead.

It is a rare bit of magic though when two lanes merge and everyone slips together into one without stopping and goes on their way.

My friend I really want to give you an award aha. Love that thinking.

There is a road near me that goes from 2 lanes into 1. Traffic always seems to come to a complete stand still when as far as im concerned there is no reason for it. Its most likely people dont give other drivers enough room to merge which makes the flow of traffic completely stop which slows everyone down.

Most likely if everyone gave others room to merge the traffic jam would never occur.

[Strong Horse]

Blown2CV said:

never accelerate through danger, is another thing people say.

In reality you are meant to merge at the merge point. If you leave loads of room in front of you which seemingly would be sufficient for you to accelerate and pass 2 cars, whilst not endangering anything in front of you (or yourself) then you're probably trying to merge too early, especially if there were more than 2 cars between you and the merge point, as could well have been the case.

I just love how it how people assume I am at fault.

Yes there were cars in front of me in my lane so I could not have gone faster. We had just pulled away from when the lights went green about 100 yards back.

When the car came up the inside lane to block me from merging by trying to mate with the car in front I booted it. I passed the car I was originally going to merge behind literally about several foot before the central reservation cut the lanes into 1 so there was no way I could have considerately merged later.

Im not one of those drivers who has to be at the front of everyone constantly but neither am I a slow poke.

He was just one of those people who pisses up the road 1 inch off the bumper of the car in front because he does not want to wait his turn and let anyone in. Ironically he had been sat in my lane behind me until he saw the lanes were about to merge. At this point he undertook me to ride the car in fronts bumper in the hope of gaining 1 car length.

We all know this sad type of driver.

Little did he know...

Edited by Strong Horse on Friday 8th March 18:46

[anonymous-user]

People who stick a "leaping cat" on the bonnet of their jaguar s/x type. They may as well just write "jaaaaaaaaaaaag" on the back....

[AlexRS2782]

captain_cynic said:

What annoys me about merging is that when a queue has formed and crawling along at 5 mph no one thinks of making a gap in front of them until they actually get to the merge point. Thus we end up with a stop-start situation as people realise they need to start making a gap far too late.

Traffic would flow more smoothly if people started making a gap before getting to the merge point so we actually look like a zip before merging like one.

Bizarre situation, that could have been avoided had the zipper technique been applied, on Thursday afternoon where the lanes merge at the BP petrol station down the road from me in Bagshot.

2 older gents attempting to "merge" and take position behind me in a queue of relativelly slow moving traffic. One in the left lane in a Volvo C30, the other in the right hand lane in a recent shape C4 Picasso. Neither wanted to defer / both had to be ahead of the other.

Slightly concerned as to whether i'd get rear ended by one of them i managed to open up a slightly bigger gap and as the slow moving queue of traffic crawled along i kept glancing in my mirrors keeping an eye on what they were up to as both started getting closer & closer & closer.

Eventually, as they started to run out of road space their mirrors touched. C4 guy successfully folding his all the way into the car and C30 guy gets his drivers mirror bent nicely forwards. But does that stop them? Nope - they kept on getting ever closer until C4 guy pushes C30 guy up the kerb and onto the pavement. C30 guy retaliates by turning off the kerb / pavement back into the passenger side front quarter panel of the C4. Did that stop them? Nope. They both kept scraping each other until C4 guy planted his foot down and dragged the entirety of the passenger side of his car down the driver side of the C30.

At this point i took the opportunity to quickly turn into the entrance to the carpark of the local Fish & Chip shop, as i was getting a bit concerned about whether C4 guy was going to end up rear ending me, i hear a loud bang. Looked out of my window and it turned out C30 guy had decided to seek retribution by planting his own foot down and smacking into the rear end of C4 guy. Rather concerningly neither of them stopped after this fairly significant bit of contact. The rear bumper on the C4 looked rather wonky as did the front on the C30 but both continued to tailgate each other along the queue of traffic.

I decided to wait a few minutes before rejoining the queue and heading off to the local Waitrose. As i drove in to the main carpark i glanced over and could see both cars parked up with the respective owners (and associated wives) standing next to their cars having a blazing arguement over who was at fault i guess Judging by the damage on both cars i reckon C30 guy must have punted the C4 from behind again at some point.

By the time i'd done my shopping and was leaving both of their cars had gone but it was totally bizarre tbh. Probably the weirdest thing i've seen since i passed my test in '97 and even typing it up it now sounds bloody ridiculous Ironically all of what played out could have been avoided had both just crawled along slowly and given way to each other rather than having to be "first".

[ashleyman]

Saw someone today driving down the road with a parking ticket still stuck to their windscreen.

[Glasgowrob]

comedy one tonight

watched a traffic X5 fully marked up dawdle up behind a mlm and sit there for a good mile or so

plod gave them a flash of the headlights to which the mlm clio decided to brake test a fully marked X5 that had been behind them for a mile
needless to say the x5 suddenly light up and i would guess a very interesting chat ensued.


dont get to see it very often but nice to see the police actually targeting the muppets

[nonsequitur]

ashleyman said:

Saw someone today driving down the road with a parking ticket still stuck to their windscreen.

Hoping, no doubt, that the wind would blow it away. Ticket? What ticket.

[nonsequitur]

Blown2CV said:

Strong Horse said:

People who dont want to merge in turn.

Theres always some under endowed gentleman. Just as you have positioned your car to the rear of the car in front in the opposite lane and are getting ready to merge. Some idiot storms from way back and hangs onto the bumper of the car you were going to merge behind.

One time this happened I dropped into 2nd and booted it so I shot past both the idiot cutting in and the car I was originally merging behind just before the road narrowed. The look on the mans face who was trying to block me front merging was that of such utter comtempt haha.

so you were originally trying to merge too early and holding up traffic behind you? Otherwise there would not have been space in front to "boot it" so cleverly into?

To be fair, rightly or wrongly, many attempt to merge as soon as they see the warning signs. Sometimes sucessful, more often not. The British attitude to queing would identify this move as pushing in.

[carlove]

Personally at a merge in turn I aim of the end of the merging lane but if I spot a gap say half way there I'll go into said gap. I find the later you merge the more likely the idiots will try and block you, I prefer to not have the aggro, however if I'm in the right mood I'll just keep moving over until they have to stop, then I give an over enthusiastic thank you, some hazards and a big wave.

[Pan Pan Pan]

Been done several times before, but in recent fog, saw several drivers in silver, black or grey cars which seem to blend into fog very well driving along with no lights on at all. Yet if a car coming the other way through the fog upsets them for any reason (possibly because the car the knob was in did not have any lights on), they are all too quick to start flashing their headlights (after which they revert back to the no lights at all situation), Are they really that thick?
Another issue when driving in fog, is when someone comes up behind and rides a few feet off the rear of the car in front, weaving as though they are impatient to get past, If an opportunity to get past does come up, they whip past and then when in front, start driving 5 or so miles per hour slower than the car they have just tailgating was doing. What is all that about?

Edited by Pan Pan Pan on Saturday 9th March 11:24

[nonsequitur]

Pan Pan Pan said:

Been done several times before, but in recent fog, saw several drivers in silver, black or grey cars which seem to blend into fog very well driving along with no lights on at all. Yet if a car coming the other way through the fog upsets them for any reason (possibly because the car the knob was in did not have any lights on), they are all too quick to start flashing their headlights (after which they revert back to the no lights at all situation), Are they really that thick?
Another issue when driving in fog, is when someone comes up behind and rides a few feet off the rear of the car in front, weaving as though they are impatient to get past, If an opportunity to get past does come up, they whip past and then when in front, start driving 5 or so miles per hour slower than the car they have just tailgating was doing. What is all that about?

Edited by Pan Pan Pan on Saturday 9th March 11:24

We will never know, Pan. Bad driving moves, literally, in mysterious ways.

[ashleyman]

nonsequitur said:

ashleyman said:

Saw someone today driving down the road with a parking ticket still stuck to their windscreen.

Hoping, no doubt, that the wind would blow it away. Ticket? What ticket.

I hoped it would blow away, hopefully so the driver would miss the 14 days discounted payment option!

[Hol]

j_4m said:

Strong Horse said:

One time this happened I dropped into 2nd and booted it so I shot past both the idiot cutting in and the car I was originally merging behind just before the road narrowed. The look on the mans face who was trying to block me front merging was that of such utter comtempt haha.

I prefer to show dominance by tearing my shirt off and jumping up and down on their bonnet, sometimes I'll throw my own faeces at them if it's been a particularly long traffic jam.

I have it on good authority that they all turn into Kenny Noy clones if you beep them.

Also, a 99% chance of finding lord Lucan hiding in their glovebox.