Just walked out. Weight lifted.

Just walked out. Weight lifted.

Author
Discussion

BigMon

3,190 posts

106 months

Thursday 12th May
quotequote all
V6 Pushfit said:
I had 25 years of ste as a salaried Partner (ie better salary than an employee but liabilities and client face of an equity Partner) and it came to a head like OP. I left and started on my own and most of my clients came with me. Since then it’s been the most enjoyable working period of my life - the freedom, the fees! and no ogre of a non working despotic equity partner babying his fist for a cash flow update every Monday morning!!!
My wife had three years as a salaried partner and did exactly the same as you! Best thing she ever did.

lrdisco

Original Poster:

643 posts

64 months

Thursday 12th May
quotequote all
Thanks to everyone. I feel so so much better for walking.
I’m a bricklayer by trade and am going to develop houses. I already have 5 plots and can start pretty much immediately.
I have picked the worst possible time just entering a recession but I’ll give it my best.

What could possibly go wrong???

xyyman

1,022 posts

202 months

Friday 13th May
quotequote all
lrdisco said:
Thanks to everyone. I feel so so much better for walking.
I’m a bricklayer by trade and am going to develop houses. I already have 5 plots and can start pretty much immediately.
I have picked the worst possible time just entering a recession but I’ll give it my best.

What could possibly go wrong???
Best of luck to you.

As many here I walked just over a year ago from an employed position which became toxic, an increasingly used term these days sadly, and resigned. The feeling of relief and well being on my last day was amazing. In the intervening year or so it seems a fair few others in that company, including directors, have voted with their feet also.

My situation was that i was offered contract positions elsewhere and am enjoying the freedom of choice that brings. Its not perfect but significantly better than before and I feel good. smile

MickC

844 posts

235 months

Friday 13th May
quotequote all
MitchT said:
Wish I could afford to do this. Most "employed" people are paid just enough to not starve while not enough to build up the cushion needed to walk away from crap situations. Employers know exactly how to keep most of us under control.
Not sure about that. Everyone should have saved 3-6 months net salary in the bank for times like this. Most employed people expand their outgoings to fit their income, with lots of pay monthly stuff and trap themselves. Obviously it does depend on salary, but most people live hand to mouth and spend everything they earn, its madness.

R56Cooper

917 posts

200 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
MickC said:
MitchT said:
Wish I could afford to do this. Most "employed" people are paid just enough to not starve while not enough to build up the cushion needed to walk away from crap situations. Employers know exactly how to keep most of us under control.
Not sure about that. Everyone should have saved 3-6 months net salary in the bank for times like this. Most employed people expand their outgoings to fit their income, with lots of pay monthly stuff and trap themselves. Obviously it does depend on salary, but most people live hand to mouth and spend everything they earn, its madness.
Yes, top tip from my uncle when I started out in the world of work. He referred to it as "fk you" money. Employer being a dick, "fk you" and walk.

Not something I've ever done and I generally believe in not burning bridges but it's nice to have the option.

Mr Spoon

1,545 posts

15 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
R56Cooper said:
MickC said:
MitchT said:
Wish I could afford to do this. Most "employed" people are paid just enough to not starve while not enough to build up the cushion needed to walk away from crap situations. Employers know exactly how to keep most of us under control.
Not sure about that. Everyone should have saved 3-6 months net salary in the bank for times like this. Most employed people expand their outgoings to fit their income, with lots of pay monthly stuff and trap themselves. Obviously it does depend on salary, but most people live hand to mouth and spend everything they earn, its madness.
Yes, top tip from my uncle when I started out in the world of work. He referred to it as "fk you" money. Employer being a dick, "fk you" and walk.

Not something I've ever done and I generally believe in not burning bridges but it's nice to have the option.
Well done OP.

zetec

4,439 posts

228 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
I did the same last year. The stress and workload my position gave me became unbearable and unmanageable. I ended up in A&E as I didn’t know what I was going to do to myself.
I still work for the same company but in a much less senior role, I go to work, do my job and go home on time. No out of hours phone calls, no people issues to deal with etc etc.
Yes it hurts financially but I am happier right now in my work than I have been for a long time.
My company have been fantastic and supportive, my then line manager questioned my motives by asking me what had happened to the Zetec that wanted all the nice things in life like holidays, cars etc. I replied by asking him what the nice things are? Is it being able to go home from work on time every day? Not working around 25% over contracted hours? Not getting phone calls at silly o’clock because something has broken? Not going home and shouting at my family as I had had a st day? He went quiet and agreed with me.
Money isn’t everything.

sociopath

2,275 posts

43 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
lrdisco said:
Well that was a while coming.
I have been consulting in Dublin for a mainland European company, the project planning was a disaster for our head office and we have an awful client.

So when our owner shouts in my face and swore at me about some poor information that I had innocently passed on it was time to call it a day. (Information supplied to me by someone on my team!)
Yes I could have checked but we were under so much pressure there was never time.

I may sound precious but I dont swear and shout in peoples faces, why would I accept someone doing it to me?

To be honest it is a weight off my shoulders. Glad to be going home, about to pack my bags and get on the ferry.

The role was well paid but it was effecting my mental health. There really is more to life. I have just turned 50 and have other projects lined up but I think I will just take a couple of weeks off and spend it with my family.

Looking forward to sleeping in my own bed and not getting up at 4am every Monday and the hell that is Leeds Bradford airport security.

So to anyone else thinking about it, just do it.
Always think about no. 1

I left E&Y after a similar experience, best thing I ever did.
In my case I basically told a client something they needed to know (not secret or classified) but it meant E&Y partner wouldn't be able to fleece the client for as long.

Good luck in the future,l.

lrdisco

Original Poster:

643 posts

64 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
Thanks again for all the great comments.
Walked in to the house. Wife gave me a big cuddle and my little dog wet it’s self with excitement.
I’m 100% certain I have done the right thing.

Driver101

11,629 posts

98 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
I hope you find something soon. There's nothing worse than having a job that's making you unhappy.

ruggedscotty

4,683 posts

186 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
Gixer968CS said:
I worked in a pretty toxic environment for a few years and as the pressure on me and the culture changed fairly gradually I didn't realise the stress I was under and the way in which it was impacting my health (physical and mental) and behaviour. In the end they took the pee and asked me to take on an impossible workload (cover two senior roles myself) and I said no. So, they made me redundant with a very nice package and I walked away. Best thing I have ever done professionally. I took an entire year off and eventually got headhunted for a similar role at a competitor which I love. Anyway, after about a month or so of leaving the toxic lot my girlfriend said to me one day "it's nice to have you back". I'll never let work impact my life to that extend again and well done OP for seeing the light. I very much doubt you'll regret it.

The upshot at Toxic Co was that they employed the two people they needed but went more junior. Gave the two little support and nothing chanmged, both have been out on stress and one has left, walked out without another job to go to. This company talks about culture and wellbeing and diversity and how its people are its greatest asset and blah blah blah but in fact it's all a lie.
Its when you realise that the talk of culture and wellbeing is actually all smoke and mirrors... its a way to try and say that were doing something about it... Thing is all those touchy feely meetings and culture talk is all rubbish if they allow the perpetrators of the issues to continue unchecked or even ignored as its getting the results the seek.

CallThatMusic

2,054 posts

65 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
Good luck mate.
Believe you did the right thing
Onwards !

JonChalk

5,540 posts

87 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
lrdisco said:
Thanks again for all the great comments.
Walked in to the house. Wife gave me a big cuddle and my little dog wet it’s self with excitement.
I’m 100% certain I have done the right thing.
Well done.

I am curious as to which of the two events listed convinced you that you had done the right thing? wink

andyA700

1,078 posts

14 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
lrdisco said:
Well that was a while coming.
I have been consulting in Dublin for a mainland European company, the project planning was a disaster for our head office and we have an awful client.

So when our owner shouts in my face and swore at me about some poor information that I had innocently passed on it was time to call it a day. (Information supplied to me by someone on my team!)
Yes I could have checked but we were under so much pressure there was never time.

I may sound precious but I dont swear and shout in peoples faces, why would I accept someone doing it to me?

To be honest it is a weight off my shoulders. Glad to be going home, about to pack my bags and get on the ferry.

The role was well paid but it was effecting my mental health. There really is more to life. I have just turned 50 and have other projects lined up but I think I will just take a couple of weeks off and spend it with my family.

Looking forward to sleeping in my own bed and not getting up at 4am every Monday and the hell that is Leeds Bradford airport security.

So to anyone else thinking about it, just do it.
Well done, right decision.
Years ago I was in a job doing a company's finances. The senior partner came into my office one day, when I was sorting out their financial software glitches (which their previous person had ignored), and asked me to sort out their personal phone/bank connection/early zoom type software, so I suggested that he speak to his software firm, because I didn;t really have a clue about it.
He swore at me for a couple of minutes, so I gave him a simple f**K off then left - felt better for it.
He was a complete ahole anyway, constantly trying to make me break industry regulations/financial regulations, which would ultimately be blamed on me, so I wasn't that unhappy.

TRIUMPHBULLET

633 posts

90 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
I have been made redundant once, the feeling in my stomach was awful.
Have walked out of 2 crap jobs and never felt bad about it.
When you make the decision you feel relieved, even if you have nothing to move to, like others have said, there is plenty of work out there if you are prepared to look.

bad company

16,126 posts

243 months

Saturday 14th May
quotequote all
V6 Pushfit said:
I had 25 years of ste as a salaried Partner (ie better salary than an employee but liabilities and client face of an equity Partner) and it came to a head like OP. I left and started on my own and most of my clients came with me. Since then it’s been the most enjoyable working period of my life - the freedom, the fees! and no ogre of a non working despotic equity partner babying his fist for a cash flow update every Monday morning!!!
Sounds like you’re either a lawyer or accountant?

V6 Pushfit

19,343 posts

87 months

Sunday 15th May
quotequote all
bad company said:
V6 Pushfit said:
I had 25 years of ste as a salaried Partner (ie better salary than an employee but liabilities and client face of an equity Partner) and it came to a head like OP. I left and started on my own and most of my clients came with me. Since then it’s been the most enjoyable working period of my life - the freedom, the fees! and no ogre of a non working despotic equity partner babying his fist for a cash flow update every Monday morning!!!
Sounds like you’re either a lawyer or accountant?
Haha neither, apparently I ended up choosing one of the most stressful careers possible and by god I felt it at times, but now without without the pressure of being ‘just’ a salaried partner (a total st existence) it’s also one of the most enjoyable. Having good clients helps hugely too.

NMNeil

3,924 posts

27 months

Sunday 15th May
quotequote all
Did it once at a well paid job working as a dispatcher for a courier company, but it just wasn't worth dealing with the constant BS.
But the very best part was when they called me 2 or 3 days later asking where a very important document was because they couldn't find it.
Saying "No idea, and I don't work for you anymore so don't phone me again", and hanging up, gave such a glorious feeling. biggrin

lrdisco

Original Poster:

643 posts

64 months

Sunday 15th May
quotequote all
Sat here having a wine on a Sunday night without worrying about my alarm going off at 04:00.
In fact Alarm cancelled for a week. On the 23rd treating myself and my wife to a week in Spain.
Going to be at Leeds Bradford at the same time as my usual flight and will see a former colleague but I’ll be in a much happier place than him.

Piersman2

6,343 posts

176 months

Sunday 15th May
quotequote all
I've contracted for over 30 years now. I've walked off 2 projects in that time. First was a bank project, the bosses were tts, the project was a bag of ste and the commute was a nightmare. But mainly one of the bosses was just an arrogant, argumentative, up himself, Aussie who was more interested in stitching up the other senior team leaders rather than even trying to deliver something worthwhile. I made the choice to not return back one monday. Apparently the next guy after me tried the same within 2 months but was threatened with being black-marked by this so ending up staying. I hated that fat, aussie prick, and I can normally get on with anyone!

The last one was more recent, I'd done 18 months straight with 1 client and then went immediately onto the books of one of the Big Four on a large, messy ongoing project. The Big Four staff were actually really good people, but they clearly had little experience of what they were doing. The client was personally OK, but they were 'demanding' and the plethora of non-value add meetings, project management and processes meant I was only seeing the next 6 months as being sat in my office at home doing 10 full on hours fire-fighting everyday to get the job done. I stuck it out for over 2 months, got the Big Four over a hump with the client and then left with zero notice. I was stressed to the max and my anxiety levels were too much. With 18 months money sat in the bank I decided to take 6 months out and just chill for the summer, which I did!

On both occasions the sense of instant relief once I'd decided I was going do it was like a giant weight being lifted from my shoulders. Immediate de-stress and anxiety reduction to almost zero, no more waking up at 4-5am and not being able to sleep again, able to get to sleep without being dog tired and a drink, etc...

I'm now back at a previous client for my third stint with them, more relaxed atmosphere, good company ethos and left to just get on with it.

The trick is to get that 6 months cash squirrelled away, and don't be scared to use it! biggrin

Edited by Piersman2 on Sunday 15th May 22:28