Have we had best drummer jokes yet?
Discussion
Way back in the days of Big Hair Rawk the drummer in a band that's starting to do reasonably well on the local circuit is totally fed up with the guitarist always getting the attention and wandering off with half-a-dozen girls in tow while he's still packing cymbals away in the van, so, on the principal of "if you can't beat 'em join 'em" he decides that he too is going to become a guitarist.
After several weeks of quietly perusing gear reviews in back issues of Guitarist magazines, reading interviews and looking at photo's of The Greats in the rock press he comes up with a shopping list of all the gear he's going to need (sure he's going to need a few lessons and a dash of talent, but hey, How Hard Can It Be?) and is ready to go shopping. Full of anticipation he polishes up his credit card, goes to town, selects his shop and, summoning all his self-confidence walks in, marches up to the counter, looks the waiting assistant in the eye and places his order.
"I want a Gibson Les Paul Standard, a Fender Stratocaster, two Fender Twin Reverbs, a Marshall Stack, and the tightest Spandex Leotard you've got please" says the (soon to be ex) drummer. "Here's my credit card.". The assistant looks the drummer up and down, sighs and shakes his head "You can't fool me" he says, "you're a drummer, you haven't got the first clue what to do with all this kit but you think that after a couple of lessons and a few pages of "Play In a Day the Bert Weedon Way" you'll be able to pick up girls after the gig just like the guitarists do! Well, let me tell you, it's not that easy and you'll never be able to do it...".
The drummer (now resigned to his lot in life) is deeply crestfallen at this and slinks out of the shop. Reaching the door he turns around to the assistant, "Just one thing" he asks "How did you know I'm really a drummer, and how do you know I can never be a guitarist?".
The assistant gives the drummer a long, sad, not unkindly look and eventually speaks, "Well son" he says, "it's like this. This is a fish and chip shop...".
No really, it's OK, I was just leaving anyway. I'll get my coat...
--
Jonathon.
After several weeks of quietly perusing gear reviews in back issues of Guitarist magazines, reading interviews and looking at photo's of The Greats in the rock press he comes up with a shopping list of all the gear he's going to need (sure he's going to need a few lessons and a dash of talent, but hey, How Hard Can It Be?) and is ready to go shopping. Full of anticipation he polishes up his credit card, goes to town, selects his shop and, summoning all his self-confidence walks in, marches up to the counter, looks the waiting assistant in the eye and places his order.
"I want a Gibson Les Paul Standard, a Fender Stratocaster, two Fender Twin Reverbs, a Marshall Stack, and the tightest Spandex Leotard you've got please" says the (soon to be ex) drummer. "Here's my credit card.". The assistant looks the drummer up and down, sighs and shakes his head "You can't fool me" he says, "you're a drummer, you haven't got the first clue what to do with all this kit but you think that after a couple of lessons and a few pages of "Play In a Day the Bert Weedon Way" you'll be able to pick up girls after the gig just like the guitarists do! Well, let me tell you, it's not that easy and you'll never be able to do it...".
The drummer (now resigned to his lot in life) is deeply crestfallen at this and slinks out of the shop. Reaching the door he turns around to the assistant, "Just one thing" he asks "How did you know I'm really a drummer, and how do you know I can never be a guitarist?".
The assistant gives the drummer a long, sad, not unkindly look and eventually speaks, "Well son" he says, "it's like this. This is a fish and chip shop...".
No really, it's OK, I was just leaving anyway. I'll get my coat...
--
Jonathon.
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