Classic from the mrs! Vol 2

Classic from the mrs! Vol 2

Author
Discussion

RowntreesCabana

1,138 posts

193 months

Sunday 4th January 2015
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The wife just asked me if Gerrard will be playing American Football when he moves over there, or will he be playing normal football like he does now

pavka007

522 posts

68 months

Sunday 4th January 2015
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RowntreesCabana said:
The wife just asked me if Gerrard will be playing American Football when he moves over there, or will he be playing normal football like he does now
Well she is wrong in both occasions biggrin He will be playing SOCCER biggrin

sparkyhx

3,131 posts

143 months

Sunday 4th January 2015
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Boydie88 said:
I imagine this guy will be along when his missus comes home and describes the petrol cap switching sides...

http://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=12174409416364...
that is just epic -

marshalla

15,902 posts

140 months

Sunday 4th January 2015
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Blown2CV said:
Can't go wrong with an iPhone based on all of that.
Care to make a small wager ? Don't forget who the phone is for and what has already been said about the decision-making process.

RobinBanks

15,395 posts

118 months

Sunday 4th January 2015
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IanUAE said:
The wife decided she wanted a new phone (currently has a Blackberry). Great me thinks that is one present sorted (you buy the phones over here). A Samsung she declared, 2 days later it was now an iPhone she wanted. When pressed she stated that the phone must have a good camera. She then finds that Nokia does a phone with a 20MP camera another one with a 41MP camera and both have free lifetime map updates. Then it is back to having another Blackberry.......

So far I haven't bought her a new phone as whichever one I buy it will be the wrong one. I predict she will still have her current phone for the next 6 months.
You can't get it right. My ex wanted an iPhone 5, so we got her one. I had a BlackBerry Bold 9790. Then a couple of months later I upgraded to a BlackBerry Z10. She tried it and wanted one of those so we swapped for a while. Then I went back to the 9790 because the iPhone was rubbish and then she wanted a 9790. So we swapped the Z10 and the 9790. Then she wanted an app which wasn't available for BB OS7 so she went to the iPhone again.

God knows what she uses now.
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SistersofPercy

1,272 posts

105 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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I don't watch true/weepy movies but yesterday happened to start watching Philomena, a true story of a woman who's child was given to an American family for adoption by Nuns in the mother and baby home she lived in. The ending was heartbreaking and I sat on the sofa having a good sob much to the amusement of husband and daughter.

Daughter pipes up "What is it you are watching anyway?" "A biopic about a woman who has her child taken away" I reply. Daughter thinks for a while then replies "I don't know why you let this stuff upset you, not like it's true is it?"
Have now explained the meaning of the word 'biopic' to 17 year old daughter who, worryingly, is currently in the middle of a Media Studies A Level...

DannyScene

5,191 posts

94 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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My girlfriend booked a hotel for us a new years eve as neither of us are big drinking types so we thought we'd go away for the night. Left her in charge of booking the room, she finds a good deal, in wetherby.

We set off to the hotel from Leeds, obviously the drive doesn't take long, upon arriving the gf says 'well that didn't take as long as I thought to get here, where is the sea?'

'Where is the sea?' I asked, 'What do you mean?'

Her: 'Well, wetherby is near the sea isn't it, that's why I booked it, it'll be nice to get up and walk along the beach front, don't you think?'

Me: 'well yes, it would be, but the sea is about 60 miles away from here'

Her: 'No it isn't, Wetherby is a seafront town!!' (Now getting angry)

Me: 'Here babe, look at this map'

Her: 'fk, I think I meant Whitby....'

It was still a nice break however being by the sea would've been nicer

NRS

13,715 posts

140 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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welshjohn said:
We were walking across the beach one day as the the tide was coming in.as we approached the estuary she pipes up " if the tide is coming in does the water flow backwards back to the source.then come down when the tide goes out.smile
In some parts of the river, yes!

ManFromDelmonte

2,742 posts

119 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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NRS said:
welshjohn said:
We were walking across the beach one day as the the tide was coming in.as we approached the estuary she pipes up " if the tide is coming in does the water flow backwards back to the source.then come down when the tide goes out.smile
In some parts of the river, yes!
Quite. Stand on London Bridge at the right times of the day and you can watch the river flowing one way, then slowly stop and start flowing the other way. Obviously not right the way back to Thames Head but still...

Vaud

31,244 posts

94 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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Same at the Exe estuary IIRC, can be 4-6knots upstream at the pinch point near the harbour?

simoid

17,339 posts

97 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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RowntreesCabana said:
The wife just asked me if Gerrard will be playing American Football when he moves over there, or will he be playing normal football like he does now
I've recited that tale to the mrs, who has berated me for saying that "well, you just don't know, do you!?"

SistersofPercy

1,272 posts

105 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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Further gem from daughter tonight whilst watching judge Rinder.

"Hmm, I like this, what do you need to be a judge?"

"Well, studying law helps for a start"

"Really? Ohh.I thought only lawyers needed that"

I worry.

marshalla

15,902 posts

140 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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SistersofPercy said:
Further gem from daughter tonight whilst watching judge Rinder.

"Hmm, I like this, what do you need to be a judge?"

"Well, studying law helps for a start"

"Really? Ohh.I thought only lawyers needed that"

I worry.
Never met a magistrate then ?

Vaud

31,244 posts

94 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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marshalla said:
Never met a magistrate then ?
Indeed... "In the legal system of England and Wales, there is a history of involving lay people, namely people from the local community who are not required to hold any legal qualifications, in the judicial decision-making process of the courts. They are called justices of the peace or magistrates."

SistersofPercy

1,272 posts

105 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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She meant a proper wig wearing judge sadly, not a magistrate.

marshalla

15,902 posts

140 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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SistersofPercy said:
She meant a proper wig wearing judge sadly, not a magistrate.
I've met a few mags. who definitely wore wigs.

RobinBanks

15,395 posts

118 months

Monday 5th January 2015
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marshalla said:
SistersofPercy said:
She meant a proper wig wearing judge sadly, not a magistrate.
I've met a few mags. who definitely wore wigs.
My dad used to drink with someone who was a magistrate, and he wore a really shut toupe.

DeuxCentCinq

14,180 posts

121 months

Tuesday 6th January 2015
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V8mate said:
Nokia Drive is the best satnav I've ever used. And, as you say, it's free. And that camera is ace! (if that helps?)
Is that available on all new Nokias?

HarryFlatters

4,113 posts

151 months

Tuesday 6th January 2015
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The wife and I took a trip to London before Christmas, and while we were there we had this conversation while we were on the London Eye...

Wife - What's that big building over there?
Me - That's The Shard
Her - The Shart?
Me - hehe

226bhp

8,431 posts

67 months

Tuesday 6th January 2015
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We were out walking in the countryside after Christmas to burn off some turkey and booze, it was a beautiful day, but around zero 'c.

Her looking across the landscape "If you didn't know how cold it was, this could be a Summers day couldn't it?"

Me: "Yeah, apart from the fact there are no leaves on the trees" (You know when you shouldn't have really opened your mouth, but decide fk it, and carry on anyhow?) The fields are covered in brown stubble and the sun is about 2 meters from the horizon?"

Her: "Do you ever agree with anything I say?!"
rolleyes


The best however came that night when we were talking about drugs and stuff, "I really want to do Heroin!" She said in a very loud excited voice, I have to admit that made me 'Lol'.
laugh