Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2
Discussion
boyse7en said:
SpeckledJim said:
He should have hidden in the bathroom with it. Rookie error.
But his wife was in the bathroom! It would have been a bit crowded in there with both of them and the bottle of wineIf a man can't sneak off with a nice bottle of wine and hide from his wife in the garage, that's a bit of a rum do.
A man's covert alcoholism and domestic ennui are his own private kingdom and we should be defending it from all comers.
The only mitigation I can offer is that she likes different wine to me. Unfortunately that wouldn't stop her drinking it, or complaining about it!
We've been together for 18 years so are both content for all bathroom activities to be solo affairs.
We've been together for 18 years so are both content for all bathroom activities to be solo affairs.
Edited by C Lee Farquar on Thursday 14th March 18:53
nonsequitur said:
gothatway said:
C Lee Farquar said:
the bottle in question was rather nice so I wasn't over inclined to share. 
That's sad.gothatway said:
Monkeylegend said:
I bet she wouldn't share her cream cake with C Lee so nothing wrong with tit for tat.
I think there might be rather a lot of innuendo in there. Is "cream cake" a euphemism of which I'm not aware ? And as for "tit for tat", well !!!Women can get very protective of their cream cakes.
Just had a fairly large shouting match. Looking for an inconsequential object she’s lost - happens to be a headphone case. I looked in lots of sensible places as did she. Cupboards, in the TV unit, in the car, under the couch, etc.
“I’ve looked everywhere. Did you look under the couch?” Said she.
“Yes, it’s not there” said I.
Two hours later she opens up the couch and finds the headphones case, in the internal storage.
“I thought you f
king looked under the couch!!!”
“I did look under it...”
Cue preposition based debate about what “under” and “in” means.
Not overly classic but indicative of how words mean different things in Mrs’ heads and in the (slightly pedantic semantic!?) real world I live in.
“I’ve looked everywhere. Did you look under the couch?” Said she.
“Yes, it’s not there” said I.
Two hours later she opens up the couch and finds the headphones case, in the internal storage.
“I thought you f
king looked under the couch!!!”“I did look under it...”
Cue preposition based debate about what “under” and “in” means.
Not overly classic but indicative of how words mean different things in Mrs’ heads and in the (slightly pedantic semantic!?) real world I live in.
simoid said:
Just had a fairly large shouting match. Looking for an inconsequential object she’s lost - happens to be a headphone case. I looked in lots of sensible places as did she. Cupboards, in the TV unit, in the car, under the couch, etc.
“I’ve looked everywhere. Did you look under the couch?” Said she.
“Yes, it’s not there” said I.
Two hours later she opens up the couch and finds the headphones case, in the internal storage.
“I thought you fking looked under the couch!!!”
“I did look under it...”
Cue preposition based debate about what “under” and “in” means.
Not overly classic but indicative of how words mean different things in Mrs’ heads and in the (slightly pedantic semantic!?) real world I live in.
A classic example of an incident which most guys, in the course of a relationship, have encountered, or will definitely come across eventually, which they now know, or will learn the hard way, that they can never “win.”“I’ve looked everywhere. Did you look under the couch?” Said she.
“Yes, it’s not there” said I.
Two hours later she opens up the couch and finds the headphones case, in the internal storage.
“I thought you f
king looked under the couch!!!”“I did look under it...”
Cue preposition based debate about what “under” and “in” means.
Not overly classic but indicative of how words mean different things in Mrs’ heads and in the (slightly pedantic semantic!?) real world I live in.
simoid said:
Just had a fairly large shouting match. Looking for an inconsequential object she’s lost - happens to be a headphone case. I looked in lots of sensible places as did she. Cupboards, in the TV unit, in the car, under the couch, etc.
“I’ve looked everywhere. Did you look under the couch?” Said she.
“Yes, it’s not there” said I.
i think i'd have responded "no, you just said you had"“I’ve looked everywhere. Did you look under the couch?” Said she.
“Yes, it’s not there” said I.
Blown2CV said:
i think i'd have responded "no, you just said you had"
I let her off as she didn’t say “LITERALLY everywhere” 
I was already baws deep in wind-up territory as the exchange began with “i’ve tidied it away somewhere I think...” to which I responded “aha! There’s your problem!”
Frank7 said:
A classic example of an incident which most guys, in the course of a relationship, have encountered, or will definitely come across eventually, which they now know, or will learn the hard way, that they can never “win.”
Indeed; the Mrs may not always be right, but she's never wrong!I finally have one worth posting, she has been getting ready and moving around the house getting this and that, we're about to leave and she asks:
Her: Have you seen my handbag?
Me: Which one? (she has several)
Her: The one I'm taking tonight
Me: ..... Yeah, like that narrows it down!
It's a very small "classic" compared to others, but I did tell her it would end up here so I thought I had better follow up!
Her: Have you seen my handbag?
Me: Which one? (she has several)
Her: The one I'm taking tonight
Me: ..... Yeah, like that narrows it down!
It's a very small "classic" compared to others, but I did tell her it would end up here so I thought I had better follow up!
Gentlemen, I ask for your assistance.
How do I demonstrate persuasively that the capacity of the washing machine is not the same as the maximum amount of clothing that can be pressed into the drum?
Time and again the washing comes back out soaking wet and because of the time of year our house is being used as a dryer. It's getting mould and I'm getting a sore throat. Possibly coincidental. I doubt it.
I've tried pointing out that too much clothing means that A: the amount of water it soaks up is larger, and B: the ability of the machine to spin it out again is lower. A compounding problem. That doesn't work.
I've tried doing a wash myself and inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work.
Any ideas?
How do I demonstrate persuasively that the capacity of the washing machine is not the same as the maximum amount of clothing that can be pressed into the drum?
Time and again the washing comes back out soaking wet and because of the time of year our house is being used as a dryer. It's getting mould and I'm getting a sore throat. Possibly coincidental. I doubt it.
I've tried pointing out that too much clothing means that A: the amount of water it soaks up is larger, and B: the ability of the machine to spin it out again is lower. A compounding problem. That doesn't work.
I've tried doing a wash myself and inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work.
Any ideas?
Alex@POD said:
I finally have one worth posting, she has been getting ready and moving around the house getting this and that, we're about to leave and she asks:
Her: Have you seen my handbag?
Me: Which one? (she has several)
Her: The one I'm taking tonight
Me: ..... Yeah, like that narrows it down!
It's a very small "classic" compared to others, but I did tell her it would end up here so I thought I had better follow up!
She takes more than 1 handbag out when she goes out?Her: Have you seen my handbag?
Me: Which one? (she has several)
Her: The one I'm taking tonight
Me: ..... Yeah, like that narrows it down!
It's a very small "classic" compared to others, but I did tell her it would end up here so I thought I had better follow up!
SpeckledJim said:
Gentlemen, I ask for your assistance.
How do I demonstrate persuasively that the capacity of the washing machine is not the same as the maximum amount of clothing that can be pressed into the drum?
Time and again the washing comes back out soaking wet and because of the time of year our house is being used as a dryer. It's getting mould and I'm getting a sore throat. Possibly coincidental. I doubt it.
I've tried pointing out that too much clothing means that A: the amount of water it soaks up is larger, and B: the ability of the machine to spin it out again is lower. A compounding problem. That doesn't work.
I've tried doing a wash myself and inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work.
Any ideas?
Quote "inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work."How do I demonstrate persuasively that the capacity of the washing machine is not the same as the maximum amount of clothing that can be pressed into the drum?
Time and again the washing comes back out soaking wet and because of the time of year our house is being used as a dryer. It's getting mould and I'm getting a sore throat. Possibly coincidental. I doubt it.
I've tried pointing out that too much clothing means that A: the amount of water it soaks up is larger, and B: the ability of the machine to spin it out again is lower. A compounding problem. That doesn't work.
I've tried doing a wash myself and inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work.
Any ideas?
Obviously not. That would be tantamount to admitting that she was wrong .See my post above yours.
SpeckledJim said:
Gentlemen, I ask for your assistance.
How do I demonstrate persuasively that the capacity of the washing machine is not the same as the maximum amount of clothing that can be pressed into the drum?
Time and again the washing comes back out soaking wet and because of the time of year our house is being used as a dryer. It's getting mould and I'm getting a sore throat. Possibly coincidental. I doubt it.
I've tried pointing out that too much clothing means that A: the amount of water it soaks up is larger, and B: the ability of the machine to spin it out again is lower. A compounding problem. That doesn't work.
I've tried doing a wash myself and inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work.
Any ideas?
buy a dehumidifier.How do I demonstrate persuasively that the capacity of the washing machine is not the same as the maximum amount of clothing that can be pressed into the drum?
Time and again the washing comes back out soaking wet and because of the time of year our house is being used as a dryer. It's getting mould and I'm getting a sore throat. Possibly coincidental. I doubt it.
I've tried pointing out that too much clothing means that A: the amount of water it soaks up is larger, and B: the ability of the machine to spin it out again is lower. A compounding problem. That doesn't work.
I've tried doing a wash myself and inviting herself to witness how the clothes come out half dry already. Didn't work.
Any ideas?
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