Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2

Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2

Author
Discussion

CharlesdeGaulle

21,731 posts

159 months

Friday 20th May
quotequote all
Doofus said:
Sang, not singed.
Eh?

BossHogg

5,079 posts

157 months

Friday 20th May
quotequote all
Watching a home renovation program with her indoors. They were looking at putting in folding doors to open up a wall. She says, "I wish we had space to get those bisexual doors" quick as a flash, I replied, "do they swing both ways?" I just got a blank look! laugh

Doofus

19,951 posts

152 months

Friday 20th May
quotequote all
CharlesdeGaulle said:
Doofus said:
Sang, not singed.
Eh?
Funny joke. Ahaha.


Jules Sunley

2,189 posts

72 months

Saturday 21st May
quotequote all
BossHogg said:
Watching a home renovation program with her indoors. They were looking at putting in folding doors to open up a wall. She says, "I wish we had space to get those bisexual doors" quick as a flash, I replied, "do they swing both ways?" I just got a blank look! laugh
Brilliant. I suppose it depends on if they identify as a door or a window these days smile

DocJock

7,582 posts

219 months

Saturday 21st May
quotequote all
havoc said:
DocJock said:
Me: I thought you were buying that MX5 today.

Her: Yeah, but I bought a horse instead.
Is your other half related to these guys...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8

biggrin
biggrinbiggrin

This is the same woman who said she had part-exchanged her Honda Civic because it was "too big" and came back with a Mazda Premacy!

kowalski655

13,059 posts

122 months

Saturday 21st May
quotequote all
BreakingBad said:
The memory kinda lingers iirc.

(I occasionally sing the “if I had a bomb and a plane to drop it from, I’d drop it on you, world leaders” and of course a verse or two from “I like trucking and I like to truck” Ah, they don’t write them like that any more). wink
Let's not forget the NTNOCN classics "Mod Monarch" & "Gob on you"

skilly1

2,444 posts

174 months

Sunday 22nd May
quotequote all
Me - Where has the coffee gone?
Her - I put it in a new pot I bought.
Me - Where is the de-caff?
Her - What De-caff, I just put both jars into the new pot.
Me - I bought some De-caff as I am trying to cut down on caffeine
Her - Well now you have 50% caffeine free coffee, perfect for weaning you off it.

Pit Pony

5,790 posts

100 months

Sunday 22nd May
quotequote all
skilly1 said:
Me - Where has the coffee gone?
Her - I put it in a new pot I bought.
Me - Where is the de-caff?
Her - What De-caff, I just put both jars into the new pot.
Me - I bought some De-caff as I am trying to cut down on caffeine
Her - Well now you have 50% caffeine free coffee, perfect for weaning you off it.
Fair. As the pot gets half empty add some more decafe. Then it's 25%.
Rinse and repeat. 12.5%
6%
3%
1.5%
Give it a good shake each time.

I went decafe after a heart attack in 2020.
Finding myself much less angry.

HTP99

19,783 posts

119 months

Sunday 22nd May
quotequote all
My wife does this really annoying and stupid thing when introducing me to a friend of hers who I've never met, when there is also another friend of hers present who I know very well, it happened earlier today.

She introduces me to the person I've never met "Alex, this is Bo, Bo this is Alex", brief pleasantries are exchanged between the 2 of us.

She turns to the other friend, then says "You know Mandy don't you?!" me and Mandy look at each other puzzled and start to take the piss, this is the Mandy that I've known for 15 odd years, socialised with her, her husband and family, been away to a 3 day festival with her, her husband and kids, went to a comedy night with her and her husband a few weeks ago and have done many other social things with her and her husband.

It is just plain weird.

vaud

44,658 posts

134 months

Sunday 22nd May
quotequote all
Pit Pony said:
Fair. As the pot gets half empty add some more decafe. Then it's 25%.
Rinse and repeat. 12.5%
6%
3%
1.5%
Give it a good shake each time.

I went decafe after a heart attack in 2020.
Finding myself much less angry.
Since I had covid coffees tastes of metal, so I stopped drinking it. Down to 2 cups of tea a day as well, and I'm sleeping better!

BossHogg

5,079 posts

157 months

Sunday 22nd May
quotequote all
HTP99 said:
My wife does this really annoying and stupid thing when introducing me to a friend of hers who I've never met, when there is also another friend of hers present who I know very well, it happened earlier today.

She introduces me to the person I've never met "Alex, this is Bo, Bo this is Alex", brief pleasantries are exchanged between the 2 of us.

She turns to the other friend, then says "You know Mandy don't you?!" me and Mandy look at each other puzzled and start to take the piss, this is the Mandy that I've known for 15 odd years, socialised with her, her husband and family, been away to a 3 day festival with her, her husband and kids, went to a comedy night with her and her husband a few weeks ago and have done many other social things with her and her husband.

It is just plain weird.
Mine is the same, I moved to this area 25 years ago, I've met a few of her friends and all of her family. She gets annoyed when she talks about people from her childhood as if I grew up here too. I have to keep reminding her I haven't got a clue who she is talking about!

tribbles

3,740 posts

201 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
Leaving for the ferry this morning, and I say to her "damn, forgot to print the ticket"

"Don't worry about it, you have the email, right?"

"Yes. If I did need it, then I'll need to turn everything on".

We get to the terminal, 3 hours later, and the kiosk is on her side. I gave her our passports. She says "Is that it? No ticket?"

Grumble...

Caddyshack

5,274 posts

185 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
tribbles said:
Leaving for the ferry this morning, and I say to her "damn, forgot to print the ticket"

"Don't worry about it, you have the email, right?"

"Yes. If I did need it, then I'll need to turn everything on".

We get to the terminal, 3 hours later, and the kiosk is on her side. I gave her our passports. She says "Is that it? No ticket?"

Grumble...
Rookie error not printing the ticket.

Milkyway

4,167 posts

32 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
“Are the pedals always in the same order”...

CanAm

7,741 posts

251 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
Milkyway said:
“Are the pedals always in the same order”...
A good question. And the answer is "They are nowadays, but not always in older cars."

alock

4,053 posts

190 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
Milkyway said:
“Are the pedals always in the same order”...
My daughter is about to start learning and asked me this question. My girlfriend helpfully said ABC - Accelerator, Brake, Clutch.

Caddyshack

5,274 posts

185 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
alock said:
Milkyway said:
“Are the pedals always in the same order”...
My daughter is about to start learning and asked me this question. My girlfriend helpfully said ABC - Accelerator, Brake, Clutch.
Yeah, not the way we read, it’s CBA.

V8mate

45,669 posts

168 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
Caddyshack said:
tribbles said:
Leaving for the ferry this morning, and I say to her "damn, forgot to print the ticket"

"Don't worry about it, you have the email, right?"

"Yes. If I did need it, then I'll need to turn everything on".

We get to the terminal, 3 hours later, and the kiosk is on her side. I gave her our passports. She says "Is that it? No ticket?"

Grumble...
Rookie error not printing the ticket.
No tickets need printing any more, do they?

When I turn up at a port, the ANPR clocks my car and the person in the box says 'Good evening, Mr V8mate'.

Traveling on trains, getting into gigs,... everything really, just requires a flash of an emailed QR code or quoting an emailed reference.

Milkyway

4,167 posts

32 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
Caddyshack said:
alock said:
Milkyway said:
“Are the pedals always in the same order”...
My daughter is about to start learning and asked me this question. My girlfriend helpfully said ABC - Accelerator, Brake, Clutch.
Yeah, not the way we read, it’s CBA.
Perhaps GF was trying to say... “As easy as ABC”.
( Must have been hell before standardisation)

Learning to drive... in NZ.
Q1: True or False scratchchin


Edited by Milkyway on Friday 3rd June 20:19

tribbles

3,740 posts

201 months

Friday 3rd June
quotequote all
V8mate said:
No tickets need printing any more, do they?

When I turn up at a port, the ANPR clocks my car and the person in the box says 'Good evening, Mr V8mate'.

Traveling on trains, getting into gigs,... everything really, just requires a flash of an emailed QR code or quoting an emailed reference.
No ticket was needed, as it happens. Just read out the booking number at the kiosk (from my email confirmation).