Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 11)

[Skyedriver]

Vipers Chicken joke

[rayny]

Skyedriver said:

Vipers Chicken joke

Do not encourage Vipers - He may get delusions of adequacy

[Sporky]

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Excellent.

[Vipers]

rayny said:

Skyedriver said:

Vipers Chicken joke

Do not encourage Vipers - He may get delusions of adequacy

I am way beyond that to one and all, we need a chuckle in the mornings these days, so keep them coming lads and lasse’s of course.

[Vipers]

Sporky said:

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Excellent.

And that sir is a tall story if ever I heard one.

[Mammasaid]

Vipers said:

Sporky said:

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Excellent.

And that sir is a tall story if ever I heard one.

But a (h)armless one though!

[Pixelpeep Electric]

someone in the pub last night used my to-do list to roll their weed in ! - they're now high on my list of priorities.

[CopperBolt]

Pixelpeep Electric said:

someone in the pub last night used my to-do list to roll their weed in ! - they're now high on my list of priorities.

[Pitre]

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Pedantry corner:
Nelson was apparently 5 ft 7 in (67") tall. His column in Trafalgar Square is 169 ft 3 in or 2031".
So that's Horatio of 30.3134328358 to 1. Approximately.

[MarkwG]

Pitre said:

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Pedantry corner:
Nelson was apparently 5 ft 7 in (67") tall. His column in Trafalgar Square is 169 ft 3 in or 2031".
So that's Horatio of 30.3134328358 to 1. Approximately.

The column is not the statue, though - the statue is 18 feet 1 inch - so roughly 6 ft tall, vs roughly 18 feet tall = ...?

[Pitre]

MarkwG said:

Pitre said:

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Pedantry corner:
Nelson was apparently 5 ft 7 in (67") tall. His column in Trafalgar Square is 169 ft 3 in or 2031".
So that's Horatio of 30.3134328358 to 1. Approximately.

The column is not the statue, though - the statue is 18 feet 1 inch - so roughly 6 ft tall, vs roughly 18 feet tall = ...?

I doff my cap to you sir.

[StevieBee]

LordGrover said:

StevieBee said:

Anyone see Dragons Den the other night? There was this bloke who'd invented an Air Freshener that's controlled by the power of thought!

Sounds daft but makes sense when you think about it.

How do you know I don't make the meme, eh, eh?

[mikal83]

Sporky said:

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

Excellent.

BUT, very very very old!

[Still Mulling]

Pixelpeep Electric said:

someone in the pub last night used my to-do list to roll their weed in ! - they're now high on my list of priorities.

[Turtle Shed]

Master Of Puppets said:

When Admiral Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.

I like that more than the chicken joke.

[glenrobbo]

LordGrover said:

StevieBee said:

Anyone see Dragons Den the other night? There was this bloke who'd invented an Air Freshener that's controlled by the power of thought!

Sounds daft but makes sense when you think about it.

WOW! I can't believe you went to all the trouble of posing those people, taking photos, and creating a photostrip just to explain StevieBee's joke.
That's proper dedication and commitment.

Edited by glenrobbo on Thursday 16th March 12:31

[EmailAddress]

glenrobbo said:

LordGrover said:

StevieBee said:

Anyone see Dragons Den the other night? There was this bloke who'd invented an Air Freshener that's controlled by the power of thought!

Sounds daft but makes sense when you think about it.

WOW! I can't believe you went to all the trouble of posing those people, taking photos, and creating a photostrip just to explain StevieBee's joke.
That's proper dedication and commitment.

[john2443]

There was a young man

From Cork who got limericks

And haikus confused

[Sticks.]

Reminds me of John Cooper Clarke's Haiku

To convey one’s mood
In seventeen syllables
Is very diffic

[Regbuser]