Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 11)

[grumpy52]

I just caught my wife about to tuck into a very phallic shaped pastry. I asked her where it came from. She replied

“It’s Greggs”.

[Legacywr]

[Tommo87]

Legacywr said:

That is going to keep on giving…

[daqinggregg]

What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?

A receding hare line.

[Stealthracer]

November the 5th wasn't good for me this year.

I stood too close to the bonfire, and my outfit was completely destroyed.

My own fault, I shouldn't have been wearing a blazer.

[mac96]

Tommo87 said:

Legacywr said:

That is going to keep on giving…

Someone forgot the legendary Glazed Ring!

[Neil1300r]

Massive away win for the little bear

[Blatter]

Neil1300r said:

Massive away win for the little bear

[Legacywr]

Blatter said:

Neil1300r said:

Massive away win for the little bear

It looked like 2-2 until Gladiator slipped on some bear st gifting Paddington a 3rd.

[epom]

Legacywr said:

Blatter said:

Neil1300r said:

Massive away win for the little bear

It looked like 2-2 until Gladiator slipped on some bear st gifting Paddington a 3rd.

Grobbelar ??

[MartG]

[GeneralBanter]

MartG said:

Brilliant

[GeneralBanter]

The BBC are more Finbarr Saunders:

[Frimley111R]

GeneralBanter said:

MartG said:

Brilliant

Almost, prob better with Sid.

[Vipers]

Frimley111R said:

GeneralBanter said:

MartG said:

Brilliant

Almost, prob better with Sid.

Explain, dont recognise the characters. Lived a sheltered life……

[vaud]

Vipers said:

Explain, dont recognise the characters. Lived a sheltered life……

Comic - Viz
Character - Roger Mellie (the man on the telly) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_Mellie

[POIDH]

I swallowed a bunch of synonyms today.
It's given me thesaurus throat ever.

[GeneralBanter]

vaud said:

Vipers said:

Explain, dont recognise the characters. Lived a sheltered life……

Comic - Viz
Character - Roger Mellie (the man on the telly) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_Mellie

[vaud]

My sewing instructor said that I’m the worst student she has ever seen…
..Oops. Wrong thread!

[Master Of Puppets]

In the train toilet yesterday when some bloke knocked on the door.

He said, "Can I see your ticket please?"

"Not right now" I shouted, "I'm having a ste!"

He said, "I don't believe you, can you pass it under the door?"

"No problem" I said, sliding it under, "The yellow bits are sweetcorn."