'tight' jokes?

[ErnestM]

He's so tight that...

...his hearing aid has a solar battery
...he's still waiting for the Bible to come out in paperback
...he won't even tip his hat
...he counts his fingers after he shakes your hand

[Bigfatnath]

He`s tighter than two coats of paint.

[ellroy]

So tight he's like a Yorkshire man with all the generosity kicked out of him.

[Tango13]

"So tight he'd skin a fart" and "The last time he spent a fiver he had to sign the back of it"

I used the last one down the club once and the old boy standing next to me laughed as he'd once been asked to sign the back of a white fiver.

[Some Gump]

[ph]
tighter than a first gear hairpin
[/ph]

[SplatSpeed]

tighter than a gnats arse squeezed over a jan jar

[Saddle bum]

He and a scotsman argued over a penny, hence the invention of copper wire.

[Elskeggso]

Tight like prom night.

[sneijder]

Saddle bum said:

He and a scotsman argued over a penny, hence the invention of copper wire.

So tight he doesn't click on the first page.

[anonymous-user]

SplatSpeed said:

tighter than a gnats arse squeezed over a jan jar

that makes no sense

[poo at Paul's]

Throws money about like a man with no arms

[VX Foxy]

HereBeMonsters said:

NDA said:

As tight as an otters pocket.

I think you've confused a few similies here.

As tight as a Nun's .

[T84]

Lord R said:

He is so tight his kids were 8 before they found out the gas meter wasnt a money box

Edited by T84 on Friday 12th November 22:59

[thesyn]

So tight he wouldn't give you the steam off his piss!

[HOGEPH]

He's so tight he uses both sides of the toilet paper.

[ClintonB]

So tight he wears tartan trousers by choice.

(I actually have a relly who was that tight & wore such strides, even as an Englishman).