ADHD - Adults

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sbarclay62

Original Poster:

419 posts

47 months

Monday 11th May 2020
quotequote all
Any adults on here suffer from ADHD? Before the covid-19 out I was the doctors to get the ball rolling to see if I suffer from it. Phoned them this morning to see how things are progressing and its been put on hold for the time being which i guess is understandable.

For my entire life from primary school right through to my adult working life i've had terrible concentration. Can't sit still, constantly fidget, can't focus on a task for any length of time, always got to be on the go doing something different.

Can it be made better or more manageable? Want to go to uni at the ripe old age of 31 but know i'll struggle if i'm still like this. fked school up and college (albeit mostly that was me being a lazy bd but I think this did play a part in it).

OFORBES

533 posts

90 months

Monday 11th May 2020
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My 10 year old was diagnosed with it a few years ago when he became challenging at school. It was a rather nice private school and they suggested he was tested, and then pretty much said that they could no longer support him when his assessment confirmed that he suffered with it.

I had never looked into it before, and hadn't ever really felt the need, but when my eldest was diagnosed I felt I should look into it to educate myself a bit more. I also saw a specialist who confirmed that I also showed signs of having always had it.

- Unless something interests me, I have a short attention span (but then I thought everyone was the same).

- I have always, for as long as I can remember, had a massively overactive brain whereby I will frequently have 5 different things all on my mind at once, or 5 different thoughts running through my brain, meaning I sometimes find it hard to listen and concentrate. It then means that I also sometimes find it hard to tell someone something without going off on a multitude of different tangents and taking ages to get to the point where it actually became a bit of a joke with my wife!

- Due to the overactive brain (and my job) I am absolutely mentally exhausted by the time I come home at night and I normally do not struggle to go to sleep. But when I do struggle to fall sleep, my brain will not let me, it doesn't matter how exhausted I am! And then on the other side of that, if I ever do wake up, my brain switches on immediately and thats then me awake and I cannot go back to sleep. I've never been able to.

- I have always also been a leg jigglier and a constant fidget. I also apparently suffer from restless leg syndrome (RLS) which gives me the worst sensations in my legs mostly at night. Whereby the only way to really describe it is that my legs have claustrophobia and just have to burst out or move uncontrollably. My legs are then pretty much tense the whole time I am asleep which leads to very tired and achey legs.

- I've always been pretty 'wired' as a person and quite highly strung, but I have always put that down to the pressures of work, business and I have always just been 100 miles an hour in the way that I am. I think quickly, and talk quickly and I just like to get stuff done immediately and to a high standard.

I apparently also suffer with anxiety and have mild OCD.

I was a little surprised with my results, but then I've used the confirmation that I had 'ADHD' to support my son, showing him that there is nothing 'wrong' with him and we regularly talk through all the pro's of having a quick brain etc.

He's been bullied a fair bit about being 'different' and he has to take an absolute multitude of tablets every day which breaks my heart when he spends weekends with me - But I try to reassure him with the fact that I've probably always suffered from it, but its never held me back in my life!

Regarding myself, I am not a big believer in labelling things, I took what the specialist said, it made me realise a few things but I didn't do anything about it other than that really.

I tried a change in my diet to try to help my mental fatigue, which helped a bit, and (sounding a bit un-manly) but when my brain gets too busy, I sit for a few minutes and take deep breaths and work hard to concentrate on nothing other than my breathing...

OFORBES

533 posts

90 months

Monday 11th May 2020
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Oh and I am 36

4Q

3,212 posts

134 months

Monday 11th May 2020
quotequote all
I’ve come to realise in recent years that I’ve had ADHD my whole life. I’m 53. It’s very much been a double edged sword as my active mind has been full of ideas and looking for something new which has helped in business but my short attention span means I need to employ someone to carry those ideas through otherwise I forget and move on. A big benefit has meant that I’m often interested in new things and really get into something when I’m interested.

sbarclay62

Original Poster:

419 posts

47 months

Wednesday 13th May 2020
quotequote all
OFORBES said:
My 10 year old was diagnosed with it a few years ago when he became challenging at school. It was a rather nice private school and they suggested he was tested, and then pretty much said that they could no longer support him when his assessment confirmed that he suffered with it.

I had never looked into it before, and hadn't ever really felt the need, but when my eldest was diagnosed I felt I should look into it to educate myself a bit more. I also saw a specialist who confirmed that I also showed signs of having always had it.

- Unless something interests me, I have a short attention span (but then I thought everyone was the same).

- I have always, for as long as I can remember, had a massively overactive brain whereby I will frequently have 5 different things all on my mind at once, or 5 different thoughts running through my brain, meaning I sometimes find it hard to listen and concentrate. It then means that I also sometimes find it hard to tell someone something without going off on a multitude of different tangents and taking ages to get to the point where it actually became a bit of a joke with my wife!

- Due to the overactive brain (and my job) I am absolutely mentally exhausted by the time I come home at night and I normally do not struggle to go to sleep. But when I do struggle to fall sleep, my brain will not let me, it doesn't matter how exhausted I am! And then on the other side of that, if I ever do wake up, my brain switches on immediately and thats then me awake and I cannot go back to sleep. I've never been able to.

- I have always also been a leg jigglier and a constant fidget. I also apparently suffer from restless leg syndrome (RLS) which gives me the worst sensations in my legs mostly at night. Whereby the only way to really describe it is that my legs have claustrophobia and just have to burst out or move uncontrollably. My legs are then pretty much tense the whole time I am asleep which leads to very tired and achey legs.

- I've always been pretty 'wired' as a person and quite highly strung, but I have always put that down to the pressures of work, business and I have always just been 100 miles an hour in the way that I am. I think quickly, and talk quickly and I just like to get stuff done immediately and to a high standard.

I apparently also suffer with anxiety and have mild OCD.

I was a little surprised with my results, but then I've used the confirmation that I had 'ADHD' to support my son, showing him that there is nothing 'wrong' with him and we regularly talk through all the pro's of having a quick brain etc.

He's been bullied a fair bit about being 'different' and he has to take an absolute multitude of tablets every day which breaks my heart when he spends weekends with me - But I try to reassure him with the fact that I've probably always suffered from it, but its never held me back in my life!

Regarding myself, I am not a big believer in labelling things, I took what the specialist said, it made me realise a few things but I didn't do anything about it other than that really.

I tried a change in my diet to try to help my mental fatigue, which helped a bit, and (sounding a bit un-manly) but when my brain gets too busy, I sit for a few minutes and take deep breaths and work hard to concentrate on nothing other than my breathing...
Thanks for the reply. Your symptoms word for word are pretty much what i have.

I'll give it another week or so with the doctor then call them back to see if they've gotten anywhere with the psychiatric departments and take it from there.

Ozzie Dave

555 posts

238 months

Friday 15th May 2020
quotequote all
diagnosed 12 months ago at 50, I realise I've had it all my life, but recently it had got a lot worse. However it meant I could work 20 hours a day for the last 20-30 years, certainly know the story of starting and not finishing as usually have a dozen projects going at once. Creatively it is a huge advantage as often problems seem to clear to you, along with possible solutions. There is a simple test you can take , that predicts likelihood and I had that when some medications were giving some serious side effects that made no sense.
We also realise now my son has it, but he like me is not really concerned as it can have advantages. Technically I'm a designer and have my own company (yes I've had a few, but sold on when I get bored and want to do something new). I love learning new things and projects are often in different fields. my son is a teacher and in the evenings is captain of a soccer club. You would want neither of us in a meeting as we constantly click pens and suchlike, it can drive others mad. The other issue can be a problem as always being a fast driver and its difficult to slow down.
Son was running a Parent interview a couple of months ago where the parent said, its not his fault he has ADHD, he swiped back, "so have I, but thats no excuse for him not even trying" For some of us its a condition that has its advantages and is far from what many say.

Benbay001

5,787 posts

147 months

Friday 15th May 2020
quotequote all
Sounds remarkably similar to me.

But what difference will a diagnosis mean? Its not like being at school, where you would get extra help and extra time in exams.

Richtea1970

669 posts

50 months

Friday 15th May 2020
quotequote all
Ozzie Dave said:
diagnosed 12 months ago at 50, I realise I've had it all my life, but recently it had got a lot worse. However it meant I could work 20 hours a day for the last 20-30 years, certainly know the story of starting and not finishing as usually have a dozen projects going at once. Creatively it is a huge advantage as often problems seem to clear to you, along with possible solutions. There is a simple test you can take , that predicts likelihood and I had that when some medications were giving some serious side effects that made no sense.
We also realise now my son has it, but he like me is not really concerned as it can have advantages. Technically I'm a designer and have my own company (yes I've had a few, but sold on when I get bored and want to do something new). I love learning new things and projects are often in different fields. my son is a teacher and in the evenings is captain of a soccer club. You would want neither of us in a meeting as we constantly click pens and suchlike, it can drive others mad. The other issue can be a problem as always being a fast driver and its difficult to slow down.
Son was running a Parent interview a couple of months ago where the parent said, its not his fault he has ADHD, he swiped back, "so have I, but thats no excuse for him not even trying" For some of us its a condition that has its advantages and is far from what many say.
Great attitude, kudos to you and your son

Chamon_Lee

3,511 posts

137 months

Saturday 16th May 2020
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I personally don’t have adhd but my wife does. After some difficult time’s it was clear something wasn’t quite right. After a stroke of luck I came across adhd and we met a specialist private and my wife is now on medication.

Medication has helped massively however we understand the importance of cbt therapy and planned for this to go ahead before covid kicked in.

I am not sure what the future holds or how long we will use the medication but I do worry sometimes the kids do/will have it.

It can be a positive in some situations but nothing can detract from the fact that it’s a hinderance too.

Good luck and look into medication and therapy.

sbarclay62

Original Poster:

419 posts

47 months

Sunday 17th May 2020
quotequote all
Benbay001 said:
Sounds remarkably similar to me.

But what difference will a diagnosis mean? Its not like being at school, where you would get extra help and extra time in exams.
I dunno if this reply was a great bit of banter? Cos if you finished my original paragraph you'd see that I am indeed going back to school (well hoping too).

Difference it would make with being diagnosed... a better quality of life hopefully, even ever so slightly. Being able to read 5 pages of a book. Being able to goto the cinema with the missus without "having" to go to the toilet half way through purely for a wander, being able to play with my son for more than 5 minutes before "having" to do the dishes, then half way through the dishes start the hoovering!


Thanks for the replies.

Ozzie Dave

555 posts

238 months

Sunday 17th May 2020
quotequote all
In my case, I never worried at school, yes I could be distracted, but also in many cases took things in faster, so never really worried.Exams are a mindgame, I just looked on them as a lesson where no-one talked or interrupted although I did find it hard keeping still and not wanting to walk out when I had finished! as for revision (yes a couple of half hours a few nights before, but rarely more), best thing is to find what your passion is, and where it lies, but not to let it become completely absorbing (in my case its design and engineering).
Yes the wife can get upset when I do some things as in some 'states' I will just carry on regardless as the job "has to be completed". Medication was only the last 18 months 'to take the edge off' and it does work. If it were not for a work incident I would never have taken them or needed them, or even have known. It can drive you to become very good at your profession, but can make reading people more difficult, and when annoyed as how something is being done can mean you say things that others may not like.
My son is very much of the same opinion, the condition he sees as an advantage now and he did not realise he had it when at school/university. It was simply after it was explained to me I had to explain it to him, and he saw it all in himself.He does not used medication but has a very busy lifestyle with work and soccer (4-5 nights a week as he is the team Captain and they are a high end amatuer team). Ironically his girlfriend is just as bad.
However, have a look around and many people who excel in their profession have had it, not just in history but currently,just realise its not only a disadvantage and many have found it to drive their passions and careers forward. Use it productively and if you have a dozen things going at once, and discard 80% of them dont worry, its the 20% that becomes important.

OFORBES

533 posts

90 months

Monday 18th May 2020
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sbarclay62 said:
Being able to read 5 pages of a book.


I really struggle to read too. Not the ability to actually read, but the ability to concentrate. It can take me an age to read things, and then because of my OCD I want to make sure I've understood everything and so I read, and re-read and read again because every time I try to read a paragraph my mind wanders off onto other thoughts and then I realise that I am reading but not taking any of it in and so I have to start the paragraph again.

Also, totally with you on the washing the dishes, only this morning I was loading the dishwasher and then after unloading half the top half I then started to wipe down the kitchen cupboards!?

Ransoman

877 posts

80 months

Monday 18th May 2020
quotequote all
I have always suspected I have it and after reading this thread, I am now convinced. All these posts pretty much describe me to a T, particularly the hundreds of projects, none of them finished bit. I always get 90% of something done and then move onto something else and i never go back to finish that 10%.

I also am bad at getting bored 1 hour into doing something so then going off to do something else. I have been repairing my Alfa for the last 6 months and the other day I started to clean the rust off the strut tower 30 mins in, no real progress made so went off to weed the garden, then cut the grass. Then spent more minutes cleaning rust, then started weeding another part of the garden.

I am doing up my house for selling right now. I am 80% of the way through the bathroom, bedroom and sitting room. 20% through the stairway, 10% through the kitchen. It is quite depressing when you realise how much of a building site I am living in but I can't muster the focus to finish any room.

sbarclay62

Original Poster:

419 posts

47 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
OFORBES said:
I really struggle to read too. Not the ability to actually read, but the ability to concentrate. It can take me an age to read things, and then because of my OCD I want to make sure I've understood everything and so I read, and re-read and read again because every time I try to read a paragraph my mind wanders off onto other thoughts and then I realise that I am reading but not taking any of it in and so I have to start the paragraph again.

Also, totally with you on the washing the dishes, only this morning I was loading the dishwasher and then after unloading half the top half I then started to wipe down the kitchen cupboards!?
I've started a trial with audible and listened to two audiobooks. Quite enjoyed it tbh. Can put the headphones while doing the chores or go for a walk outside etc

Woodrow Wilson

271 posts

150 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
I'm similar to some of the posts above.

I'm in my 40s.

Terrible procrastination over things that don't interest me.
I hate admin tasks and, although I'm good at and enjoy writing, I'm terrible at proof-reading my own work -especially dull, procedural stuff.
Scatter-brained and easily distracted. I forget what I am supposed to be doing.
Organisation and planning I find very difficult.
I'm very sensitive to loud (especially multiple) voices, oddly.
Out of sight, out of mind. If my wife tidies my things up, I forget all about them.
I'm good at open play in sports, but terrible at set-pieces.
I was clumsy as a child/young adult, but much less so as a middle-aged adult.
I made poor education choices and did badly at a highly-regarded university, despite attending lectures and understanding a lot, through being unable to manage my time and motivate myself.
I went on to make poor career choices and find my job very tedious. I have clock-watched for over twenty years.
Working from home is awfully dull.
My 20s were frustrating. Friends were trying to forge careers -I hated work and struggled. I went to a careers consultant, but felt that I'd been ripped off at the time.
I can appear confident and I am articulate, so I am able to mask the symptoms, up to a point, although I have lost previous jobs due to my issues.
Sitting around relaxing isn't relaxing to me at all. I always like to be doing something.


At Primary and Secondary school, I was "bright", an early developer and I was articulate from a young age. My Mum always organised me, so nobody picked up on any issues I had.
I have always read a lot and interested in many things, technical, current affairs, travel, adventure, sociology, geography, history etc etc. I'm good at quizzes and can hold my own in conversation with all kinds of people.
I'm quite competitive.
I am always keen to try things and have quite a wide range of practical skills. I'm quite self-sufficient.
I am very active ( I get restless if I am not) and have a high level of fitness, but very much an all-rounder, as i do not have the required focus to specialise. I have always been drawn to quite risky sports.
As an adult I am considered quite bright, if possibly a little unusual -I'm very chatty for a man and I no longer try to fit in if don't feel the need to.

Despite my issues with bordeom and distraction, I do really enjoy driving and riding and will happily do a long drive across Europe.


I saw doctors about it a few years ago, and did briefly try some medication, but wasn't convinced that it made much difference. I didn't get any more treatment or see anybody else about it.

I think I just need to find work that is a better fit to me. I don't think I can change myself, although I would be interested in speaking to somebody who might be able to help me find something better.

I just think that I'm just an example of somebody who is a bit different, a version of normal that is a poor fit for the modern world of work. I might have been more suited to Victorian exploration!



ps. My daughter appears to be similar, unfortunately....


Edited by Woodrow Wilson on Tuesday 19th May 17:54


Edited by Woodrow Wilson on Tuesday 19th May 20:12

anxious_ant

2,591 posts

69 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
I've been diagnosed as an adult with ADD 10 years ago. I'm 39.
It's a long process as in the UK there are very cases where adults are diagnosed.
In my opinion medication is also not too accessible. I'm on Concerta XL at the moment and have definitely helped my career.

Symptoms are pretty similiar to earlier posters. I get bored easily and are very impulsive. I also always seem to crave stimulation. Before I received medication by career wasn't really going anywhere. I seem to indulge in excessive consumption of alcohol, partying etc.
Gradually after medication and CBT I seem to have developed more focus. I won't say I'm cured, I don't think there is a cure however it does help.

I also think it may be passed down genetically as my daugther is showing some symptoms. She is exceptionally bright however seem to go off tangent at times.

Edited by anxious_ant on Tuesday 19th May 17:53


Edited by anxious_ant on Tuesday 19th May 17:54

Woodrow Wilson

271 posts

150 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
OFORBES said:
Also, totally with you on the washing the dishes, only this morning I was loading the dishwasher and then after unloading half the top half I then started to wipe down the kitchen cupboards!?
I invariably end up being distracted .

Many cups containing only teabags have been found next to the kettle by my thirsty wife, who has invariably tripped over the laundry that I was supposed to have put in the washing machine in the utility room.

I will probably have fixed something in the garage, though.

Woodrow Wilson

271 posts

150 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
anxious_ant said:
I've been diagnosed as an adult with ADD 10 years ago. I'm 39.
It's a long process as in the UK there are very cases where adults are diagnosed.
In my opinion medication is also not too accessible. I'm on Concerta XL at the moment and have definitely helped my career.
Yes. it took the doctors some convincing that I had it.

anxious_ant

2,591 posts

69 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
Woodrow Wilson said:
Yes. it took the doctors some convincing that I had it.
For me Dexamphetamine seem to help the most however it's not possible to get the long release version here in the UK. I was put on a short trial but was revoked after I moved down from Scotland.

Woodrow Wilson

271 posts

150 months

Tuesday 19th May 2020
quotequote all
anxious_ant said:
Woodrow Wilson said:
Yes. it took the doctors some convincing that I had it.
For me Dexamphetamine seem to help the most however it's not possible to get the long release version here in the UK. I was put on a short trial but was revoked after I moved down from Scotland.
I'm not keen on taking drugs like that long-term.

I'm possibly "high-functioning" ADHD, if that exists.

Away from work, I'm mostly fine, even if i annoy my wife with my forgetfulness. I have done some good things and I enjoy myself. I'm quite flexible and can cope with changes of plan.

I'm currently reading "Journeys Through ADDulthood". It's quite interesting and I can relate to it. It is more about acceptance of who you are than trying to fix yourself.

Edited by Woodrow Wilson on Tuesday 19th May 20:24