Help my children finance
Discussion
I have 2 very young children. I am scared that if I get planted and my partner replaces me with someone then my children might find themselves in a bad living situation.
I have been feeling trapped as a child and want them to be able to get life on straight keel once 18.
I want to make sure when they hit 18 they have money to rent something in case they need to run away.
Please advice in your opinion on the vessel for the funds and how much.
I got an idea how much I can afford but dont want to influence your advice. Let me know if I am missing something
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
I have been feeling trapped as a child and want them to be able to get life on straight keel once 18.
I want to make sure when they hit 18 they have money to rent something in case they need to run away.
Please advice in your opinion on the vessel for the funds and how much.
I got an idea how much I can afford but dont want to influence your advice. Let me know if I am missing something
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
Blue_star said:
I
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
This is exactly what will happen. I gave my daughter £1000 for passing her GCSE as did my mother. She straight away bought an iPhone 15 Pro Max (Her dream phone as she called it) despite me begging her not to. She has had it stolen, smashed the screen and then 2 months later destroyed it by dropping it in water. Luckily the Apple care insurance paid for the last two.I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
She worked for the whole of last summer and earned £4000. She has now blown virtually all of this on Ubers (would never consider getting a bus), drinking, eating out and various other crap. Hundreds of pounds was spent on driving lessons and other things that she booked and then completely forgot about and didn't cancel.
She is due to get her Child Trust Fund very soon, she will instantly blow that on crap too.
She is off to University in September, I am dreading it as she thinks it is going to party central.
What pisses me off is I work hard for my money and the money she is wasting is basically my money that I gave to her.
They have been left 15% each of my parents money in my parents will, I don't even want to think where that will go when the time comes.
I’d suggest a Junior S&S ISA in a global low cost tracker fund.
More important is helping educate your kids. Sorry, but doesn’t sound like TBTS managed that (yet?).
Start with pocket money. At a very young age that is sweetie cash, but try to pitch it that if they wanted a comic, they might have to save a week or two.
Maybe try your own version of the Stanford Marshmallow experiment - some people are spenders, some are wiser!
We got ours accounts with Santander (Abbey back then, I suspect). They could save, and as they got older, their ability to use it grew with them. By Uni age, they get a free student railcard.
At a teenager age, we started giving them a bit more, but THEY had to buy their non-school clothes. Suddenly the Superdry tops their friends all had we less desirable when it was all their savings.
Define jobs that can earn them a bit more.
Talk about money with them: income, tax, wages, mortgages. My parents generation never really did, & when I was young money was like water, flowed in and out as I earned it.
If they don’t understand the link between effort & reward, I guess it is an uphill battle for them through life. Maybe they will earn it as an influencer
More important is helping educate your kids. Sorry, but doesn’t sound like TBTS managed that (yet?).
Start with pocket money. At a very young age that is sweetie cash, but try to pitch it that if they wanted a comic, they might have to save a week or two.
Maybe try your own version of the Stanford Marshmallow experiment - some people are spenders, some are wiser!
We got ours accounts with Santander (Abbey back then, I suspect). They could save, and as they got older, their ability to use it grew with them. By Uni age, they get a free student railcard.
At a teenager age, we started giving them a bit more, but THEY had to buy their non-school clothes. Suddenly the Superdry tops their friends all had we less desirable when it was all their savings.
Define jobs that can earn them a bit more.
Talk about money with them: income, tax, wages, mortgages. My parents generation never really did, & when I was young money was like water, flowed in and out as I earned it.
If they don’t understand the link between effort & reward, I guess it is an uphill battle for them through life. Maybe they will earn it as an influencer
mikeiow said:
I
At a teenager age, we started giving them a bit more, but THEY had to buy their non-school clothes. Suddenly the Superdry tops their friends all had we less desirable when it was all their savings.
That certainly isn't my experience, what is annoying is the amount of clothes they buy online, don't like/don't fit so they and they just leave on the bedroom floor.At a teenager age, we started giving them a bit more, but THEY had to buy their non-school clothes. Suddenly the Superdry tops their friends all had we less desirable when it was all their savings.
They did return some White Fox clothes, but as they don't refund they ended up with hundreds of dollars in their White Fox accounts that they couldn't be bothered to spend.
As someone who would never let any refund go, no matter how small, it boils my piss.
Start off with some form of either S&S ISA or perhaps Investment Trust Funds held within an ISA.
They can be in the child’s name generally until they reach 18 with yourself as Trustee.
Kick start with as much as you can / want to fund with and then top up as and when you can.
Alternatively fund in your own name but make sure your will is clear as to age of acquirement and what you are leaving specifically them if you go that route.
You may want to think about this in any event.
In the meantime as said already try and educate them in financial matters as much as is realistic.
They can be in the child’s name generally until they reach 18 with yourself as Trustee.
Kick start with as much as you can / want to fund with and then top up as and when you can.
Alternatively fund in your own name but make sure your will is clear as to age of acquirement and what you are leaving specifically them if you go that route.
You may want to think about this in any event.
In the meantime as said already try and educate them in financial matters as much as is realistic.
FriedMarsBar said:
If you're not using your ISA allowance, which is £20 per annum, I'd suggest going this route as that way you can keep control and it's quite simple.
You could even consider a Stocks and Shares ISA which will most likely lead to a better rate of return over 10 to 15 years.
This is the correct answer. You could even consider a Stocks and Shares ISA which will most likely lead to a better rate of return over 10 to 15 years.
Along with some financial education for them. And if you’re really worried about what your wife will do as soon as you die, you’ll need to set up a trust in your will and make sure someone other than your wife knows about it!
I'm thinking about setting up a high-risk portfolio S&S ISA for my two nephews as a surprise gift when they're 18. Something like a tenner a month to each set and forget. Maybe something like that but more than a tenner a month.. If they turn out to be little turds I can keep it for a motorbike fund instead.
ThingsBehindTheSun said:
I gave my daughter £1000 for passing her GCSE as did my mother. She straight away bought an iPhone 15 Pro Max (Her dream phone as she called it) despite me begging her not to. She has had it stolen, smashed the screen and then 2 months later destroyed it by dropping it in water. Luckily the Apple care insurance paid for the last two.
She worked for the whole of last summer and earned £4000. She has now blown virtually all of this on Ubers (would never consider getting a bus), drinking, eating out and various other crap. Hundreds of pounds was spent on driving lessons and other things that she booked and then completely forgot about and didn't cancel.
She is due to get her Child Trust Fund very soon, she will instantly blow that on crap too.
She is off to University in September, I am dreading it as she thinks it is going to party central.
What pisses me off is I work hard for my money and the money she is wasting is basically my money that I gave to her.
That's a sad story. Unless she's lucky she'll be working until she's 70. I would stop giving her money so hopefully she comes to view it as a finite resource.She worked for the whole of last summer and earned £4000. She has now blown virtually all of this on Ubers (would never consider getting a bus), drinking, eating out and various other crap. Hundreds of pounds was spent on driving lessons and other things that she booked and then completely forgot about and didn't cancel.
She is due to get her Child Trust Fund very soon, she will instantly blow that on crap too.
She is off to University in September, I am dreading it as she thinks it is going to party central.
What pisses me off is I work hard for my money and the money she is wasting is basically my money that I gave to her.
A bare trust- most simple form of trust that will see assets pass to them at 18. You can oversee it until then/if you snuff it another trust can oversee. If too expensive I.e you won’t be putting enough in to justify the trust, just do cheap stocks and shares ISAs for each of them (fidelity or Hargreaves lansdown free for JISA) and buy a cheap s&p500 tracker like the UBS one (0.09% fee I think).
Blue_star said:
I have 2 very young children. I am scared that if I get planted and my partner replaces me with someone then my children might find themselves in a bad living situation.
I have been feeling trapped as a child and want them to be able to get life on straight keel once 18.
I want to make sure when they hit 18 they have money to rent something in case they need to run away.
Please advice in your opinion on the vessel for the funds and how much.
I got an idea how much I can afford but dont want to influence your advice. Let me know if I am missing something
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
A friend then aged 18, inherited £20 grand about 16 years ago. Her “ hanger on Best Mates “ convinced her that a holiday in Ibiza was called for. We all know what a rip off entry to any of those clubs cost, let alone the price of drinks. She blew the lot in under six months. She was simply WAY too young to handle that kind of money…..I have been feeling trapped as a child and want them to be able to get life on straight keel once 18.
I want to make sure when they hit 18 they have money to rent something in case they need to run away.
Please advice in your opinion on the vessel for the funds and how much.
I got an idea how much I can afford but dont want to influence your advice. Let me know if I am missing something
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
A bare trust- most simple form of trust that will see assets pass to them at 18. You can oversee it until then/if you snuff it another trustee can oversee. If too expensive I.e you won’t be putting enough in to justify the trust, just do cheap stocks and shares ISAs for each of them (fidelity or Hargreaves lansdown free for JISA) and buy a cheap s&p500 tracker like the UBS one (0.09% fee I think).
Edited by Gville on Monday 31st March 21:50
ThingsBehindTheSun said:
This is exactly what will happen. I gave my daughter £1000 for passing her GCSE as did my mother. She straight away bought an iPhone 15 Pro Max (Her dream phone as she called it) despite me begging her not to. She has had it stolen, smashed the screen and then 2 months later destroyed it by dropping it in water. Luckily the Apple care insurance paid for the last two.
She worked for the whole of last summer and earned £4000. She has now blown virtually all of this on Ubers (would never consider getting a bus), drinking, eating out and various other crap. Hundreds of pounds was spent on driving lessons and other things that she booked and then completely forgot about and didn't cancel.
She is due to get her Child Trust Fund very soon, she will instantly blow that on crap too.
She is off to University in September, I am dreading it as she thinks it is going to party central.
What pisses me off is I work hard for my money and the money she is wasting is basically my money that I gave to her.
They have been left 15% each of my parents money in my parents will, I don't even want to think where that will go when the time comes.
I cannot even comprehend just how bad a parent you’ve been (and continue to be) to your child.She worked for the whole of last summer and earned £4000. She has now blown virtually all of this on Ubers (would never consider getting a bus), drinking, eating out and various other crap. Hundreds of pounds was spent on driving lessons and other things that she booked and then completely forgot about and didn't cancel.
She is due to get her Child Trust Fund very soon, she will instantly blow that on crap too.
She is off to University in September, I am dreading it as she thinks it is going to party central.
What pisses me off is I work hard for my money and the money she is wasting is basically my money that I gave to her.
They have been left 15% each of my parents money in my parents will, I don't even want to think where that will go when the time comes.
Man the f
k up, and try to put right the inadequacies as a parent you’ve shown over the last 18 years.Perhaps being a good parent should take priority over turbo posting nonsense on an internet forum?
Edited by Mick Dastardly on Monday 31st March 21:36
I think these days way too many kids have access to large sums of money they just don't see the value of money or the real world. Easy come... easy go.
My wife's sisters kids are primary school age and they already have savings accounts with 10's of thousands in them thanks to wealthy grandparents.
Whilst thats great and will of course give them a great start it also opens up a massive can of worms. And thats before grand pop and gamgam leave them real serious money in another 20 years.
Perhaps its a touch of the green eyed monster, but when a 6 year old has the sort of savings I had in my late 20s I think the world has gone a bit mad.
OP, I would just get a good will drawn up. Save into your own ISA / SIPP and keep control yourself, then you know if you did die the will will keep the kids right and the money will go to them. Trying to shoe horn money into an account "just in case" this strange situation happens is maybe not going to give you best control. Also, tell your kids. Way too many parents seem to not want their kids to know how the will works - if they know its IMO better. Just my 2ps.
My wife's sisters kids are primary school age and they already have savings accounts with 10's of thousands in them thanks to wealthy grandparents.
Whilst thats great and will of course give them a great start it also opens up a massive can of worms. And thats before grand pop and gamgam leave them real serious money in another 20 years.
Perhaps its a touch of the green eyed monster, but when a 6 year old has the sort of savings I had in my late 20s I think the world has gone a bit mad.
OP, I would just get a good will drawn up. Save into your own ISA / SIPP and keep control yourself, then you know if you did die the will will keep the kids right and the money will go to them. Trying to shoe horn money into an account "just in case" this strange situation happens is maybe not going to give you best control. Also, tell your kids. Way too many parents seem to not want their kids to know how the will works - if they know its IMO better. Just my 2ps.
Blue_star said:
I have 2 very young children. I am scared that if I get planted and my partner replaces me with someone then my children might find themselves in a bad living situation.
I have been feeling trapped as a child and want them to be able to get life on straight keel once 18.
I want to make sure when they hit 18 they have money to rent something in case they need to run away.
Please advice in your opinion on the vessel for the funds and how much.
I got an idea how much I can afford but dont want to influence your advice. Let me know if I am missing something
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
decent life insurance, and some therapy for you. I have been feeling trapped as a child and want them to be able to get life on straight keel once 18.
I want to make sure when they hit 18 they have money to rent something in case they need to run away.
Please advice in your opinion on the vessel for the funds and how much.
I got an idea how much I can afford but dont want to influence your advice. Let me know if I am missing something
I also dont want them to reach 18 and blow money on craps as they think they rich.
I am not rich
Gassing Station | Finance | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff