RE: Vauxhall releases speed retardant

RE: Vauxhall releases speed retardant

Saturday 1st April 2006

Vauxhall releases speed retardant

Research finds people are driving too fast


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Vauxhall asks: are you VXR enough? After extensive market research, Vauxhall has discovered that a number of people arenโ€™t.

In direct response to some media critics who claim the Astra VXR is โ€˜just too powerfulโ€™ the Luton-based company is announcing a new accessory to tame the output of its 237bhp turbocharged engine.

Taking the form of a fully-branded detachable padded mat, it uses Velcro fasteners to attach itself to the carpet beneath the accelerator pedal. This stops the throttle from being depressed fully and instantly reduces the power output.

Under strict testing conditions, Vauxhall engineers discovered that the 0-60mph time of an Astra VXR fitted with the device increased from the normal 6.2 seconds to a far more stately 14.06 seconds, while the top speed was reduced from 152mph to just 104mph.

The device, which is available to order at Vauxhall retailers from 1 April, has been named the Accelerator Pedal Retarding Intervention Lump.

Vauxhallโ€™s VXR development engineer R. Hugh-Shaw said: โ€œWe could have made the Astra VXR less powerful in the first place, but we thought weโ€™d let customers decide how much performance they would like by simply choosing the position of the accelerator pedal with their right foot. For anyone who is incapable of doing this, the AP-RIL could prove a godsend. If there is sufficient demand, we will consider widening the range with a mat which gives the 6.0-litre Monaro the performance of a two-litre.โ€

Author
Discussion

smithsi

Original Poster:

510 posts

194 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
FFS what is the point in buying a powerful car if you can only drive it like a 1 litre Micra.

At the end of the day if you are not able to drive a powerful car due to lack of ability then there are 2 choices:

1. Go buy a micra
2. Get driver training to bring you up to a sensible standard - I did.

Porkbrain

406 posts

202 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
smithsi said:


1. Go buy a micra
2. Get driver training to bring you up to a sensible standard - I did.



3. Check your calendar to see if its a go-faster day

bga

8,134 posts

216 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
Porkbrain said:
smithsi said:


1. Go buy a micra
2. Get driver training to bring you up to a sensible standard - I did.



3. Check your calendar to see if its a go-faster day

Marki

15,763 posts

235 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
smithsi said:
FFS what is the point in buying a powerful car if you can only drive it like a 1 litre Micra.

At the end of the day if you are not able to drive a powerful car due to lack of ability then there are 2 choices:

1. Go buy a micra
2. Get driver training to bring you up to a sensible standard - I did.




ninjaboy

2,525 posts

215 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
April fools anyone wouldn't surpirse me from vauxhall though

>> Edited by ninjaboy on Saturday 1st April 09:24

J500ANT

3,101 posts

204 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
I wonder if its just a way of taming the torque steer?

smithsi

Original Poster:

510 posts

194 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
Yep, didn't realise it was April 1st. Duh, it's early.

Trouble is with this country and the nanny state the way it is, these things are not funny any more.

robinhood21

29,398 posts

197 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
"The device, which is available to order at Vauxhall retailers from 1 April, has been named the Accelerator Pedal Retarding Intervention Lump."

Me thinks we have been had.

pony power

915 posts

185 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
before i saw the date i thought that was a good idea...

vodkakid

1,076 posts

237 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
p.s luton hasn't built cars for a long time......

D_Mike

5,301 posts

205 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
said:

Vauxhall’s VXR development engineer R. Hugh-Shaw


hahaha

FunkyNige

7,431 posts

240 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
We had a similar way og getting cars to go faster - cut away the carpet under the accelerator pedal arm so you could push it down more

Polarbert

17,854 posts

196 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
I was reading through and thinking what a piss take, then the penny dropped and I realised that it had to be an April Fools joke.


Good one though, I wonder what BMW have in todays paper? Self cleaning paint anyone?

horton

804 posts

217 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
smithsi said:
FFS what is the point in buying a powerful car if you can only drive it like a 1 litre Micra.

At the end of the day if you are not able to drive a powerful car due to lack of ability then there are 2 choices:

1. Go buy a micra
2. Get driver training to bring you up to a sensible standard - I did.



yes i agree, it would seem a little silly to RETARD the speed of a nice car.

dutch paul

130 posts

198 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
Polarbert said:



Good one though, I wonder what BMW have in todays paper? Self cleaning paint anyone?


Self-activating indicators??

GOM

1,650 posts

193 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
I have plenty of bricks available for slipping under your acclerator - only £20 each in the colour of your choice (red). Conblocks available for Tivs. All enquiries to Ted please.

Edt

4,934 posts

249 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
I know someone that took her car to the garage as it felt down on power; the mat had moved & was stopping the pedal. Funny thing was the garage didnt suss the problem & called in help from an expert 3rd party !
ED

scared but happy

23,749 posts

194 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
I remember an advert on Ebay selling "The Brick" that had somewhat the same effect, but could also be used under the brake pedal to reduce pad wear.


Is this compatable for left hand drive as well?

blueyes

4,799 posts

217 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
scared but happy said:
I remember an advert on Ebay selling "The Brick" that had somewhat the same effect, but could also be used under the brake pedal to reduce pad wear.


Is this compatable for left hand drive as well?


Probably not because the throttle is on the left in left hand drive cars.








adycav

7,615 posts

182 months

Saturday 1st April 2006
quotequote all
dutch paul said:
Polarbert said:



Good one though, I wonder what BMW have in todays paper? Self cleaning paint anyone?


Self-activating indicators??


Or a 'hilarious' 7-speed gearbox with 11 settings..?